milliways_bar | (no subject)

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It's one of those posts.

There's a spoilerific and mildly tipsy Desmond in a booth, sketching something that might be a snowglobe, only that's silly, right?

Another booth has a Hawkeye, with a glass of scotch and a newspaper from home -- it's amazing what Bar'll give you.

At a table by the noticeboard is Wes, copying English words from the various signs and seeing how much he can translate without checking the primer. (Answer: not many. Rose is watching from the next table over, smirking slightly at each mistake. It's great being able to read anything. Yay TARDIS!)

Ben's at the Bar with a chocolate milkshake -- that's not changed after three years, apparently. He's stealing occasional curious glances at an uneasy man nearby, though: Fi's wandered in wearing his off-duty clothes and without his brothers, but he figured he'd have a glass of fruit juice anyway. (And why not, eh?)

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Ooh, Wes got burned.

"Not that it needs to rise, being as high as it is already," he continues from her statement, giving her a cool look.

"I wouldn't dare steal your cookies," he says, with added :O! "But I bought these, so they're half mine anyway. And look, see, stick 'em together, with another cream part. Tastes good."

She gives a rather un-ladylike snort. "Yeah, whatever you say, Wes. I'm so sorry I denied your amazing hotness."

Yeah, right.

"And you would so steal my cookies." She points to said cookies -- the real cookies -- and adds, "See? Over and over." She does as he says, though.

"It's okay," he says, making great allowances. "I forgive you. Enough people do recognise it after all."

He grins and munches on his current one. "Well, maybe I would, then. These are still half-mine, though!"

"You have never heard of the word 'sarcasm,' have you?" Shalla shakes her head sadly, then eats her cookie.

"Ha! You admit that you steal my cookies, then. It's okay, though, I know you can't help yourself," she says, mouth full of Oreo.

"I'm immune to sarcasm," Wes says, with a pfft. "So, no. Wasted effort."

His grin gets a little more lopsided, but he finishes off his cookie before shaking his head. "It's sad, I know, but I'm just obsessed with cookies. Nothing I can do, 'mfraid."

"Ah. That must be why so many things go over your head, then." Beat. "And that...really wasn't that insulting." She sighs. Can't get it perfect all the time.

"Aw. Just when I was starting to feel special. Now I find out you steal everyone's cookies." She tilts her head sideways, thinking for a moment.

"Or try to anyways. Not sure how many would let you. Standards, again."

"Better luck next time," Wes offers with a grin.

Then he goes for mild indignation. "Not everyone's. It's usually them trying to steal mine, you know."

No, really. That's how the whole euphemism even started, after all.

"I just have the best cookies. Not my fault everyone likes them so much," he adds, and holds up an Oreo for emphasis.

She ducks her head and grins slightly. "Thanks."

Awww, cute!

"So, if everyone is after your cookies, and you're after mine, that means I should be pretty flattered, right?" She snags a neglected chocolate chip and pops it into her mouth.

Stop being cute, Shalla!

Wes ponders this, chewing on his Oreo.

"Right," he decides. "Clearly you're just one of the few worthy people for me to steal cookies from. Congratulations on making the list. You don't get a prize, though."

She can't help it!

Shalla goes :O. (But cutely)

"I think I deserve some kind of prize. I mean, the entire galaxy loves me, I should get something." She pouts.

Pilots and their bruised egos.

"Wellll..."

Wes eyes her dubiously.

"They don't love you as much as me, though. And no one gave me a prize. So I don't see why you should get one. You've already got cookies, after all," he points out.

She glares right back at him.

"Yes, but you keep stealing my cookies. So I deserve a prize." Or she will pout more.

"I could give them back?" he suggests while munching on a cookie, then opens his mouth to demonstrate with a preview.

He's five.

"WES! EW!" She leans across the table and grabs his chin, trying to close his mouth.

"Close it!"

Wes snickers but obliges, and swallows the cookie mush.

"That's a no, then?"

"That's a 'you need help.' And a 'you act like a four year-old.'"

She shudders. And then straightens quickly, remembering.

"Oh! Face and I need you for something!"

"Insulting a superior officer, Lieutenant." Wes shakes his head. "--I'm at least nine."

He blinks at that, then eyes her. "Face and you? I don't think I like the sound of that right there."

"You aren't my superior officer, Lieutenant."

She nods her head quickly, beaming at him. "Well, we need you to take a message to Command. You don't have to know what it says. Just take it. And try not to let them kill you for treason, okay?"

'Cause that'd be bad.

"Am so," he says, pretending to be sulky.

"...wow. You're really reassuring. Why don't I get to know what it says?" Wes goes for the sad look. "Don't you trust me?"

"Are not," she retorts, maturely not sticking her tongue out!

"Well, see, it involves holding Commander Antilles for ransom. See? You would be better off not knowing what it says." Even though she kinda just told him.

"Am too ... times infinity."

Ha!

"You-- wait, what?" Wes stares at Shalla, amused. "You're going to hold Wedge to ransom? They call that mutiny in most systems, you know."

"Are not times infinity plus one!" PWNED.

"Well, yes, but see they can't get us for mutiny if we're here. And you say you're from the future, so they won't know I did. Or something." It's foolproof!

Well, damn! Wes looks sad now, having been so clearly beaten. No, really. Devastated.

Then he just looks like this: o_O

"Well, that's true. Safe at the end of the universe. But you know, Wedge isn't from the same time as me either, here. So I'll just look stupid, taking a ransom note for someone who hasn't even been kidnapped in my time."

He nods. See? Flaw!

Shalla owns Wes so hard. And she knows this, judging by the grin on her face.

"..."

Huh.

"We could take holos! Of him tied up! And then say that we...put an impostor in the Commander's place." She nods, because this won't result in Wedge getting interrogated or jailed or anything.

Lies.

"...some people would pay money just to see holos of Wedge tied up," Wes says, pulling a face. This is clearly not a mental image he wanted.

"You could say that. They might even believe you. But then they'd just send in, well, you guys to blow everything up, so okay, that didn't really work how I intended, never mind."