River breathes in

(too much skin too much fabric weight air gravity too much and

the collar's a weight that blends in and a weight that's agonizingly distinct and

she's fine, she's fine everything's fine no need to worry no need to fret it's just a body and bodies

die

so easily

oh God I wish I could

I wish I could phase I wish I could breathe I wish I could dance I wish I could be free but

but but but

she's choking on air she's bleeding because when she hits it's pain that's a choice (all of this is her choice) and she can feel every molecule every hair every thread all of it like razors and fire and it won't go away she wants out she's trapped and they've made her body betray her until she can't break free) and

(let me out)

she can't hear her own moan of pain and she

(let me out LET ME OUT but all she can feel are walls and locks and walls it's too much it's too much it's too much)

can't feel when she jerks and overbalances and topples blind and boneless from the rafter.