River learned a long time ago not to care about the dignity of crying. It's easier that way, when you can't ever stop yourself anyway.

She's crying, and she can feel the itchy horrible trickle of each tear against her skin, feel her shirt shift fractionally (imperceptibly) with each heaving breath, feel arms like sunlight and grass and rOtTeN ShReDeD sIlK around her, she can feel it all and it all hurts because it won't go away.