milliways_bar | (no subject)

Entry tags:

autor,
punie tanaka

(no subject)

Two mountains of books surround a skinny boy in the library today. Two mountains, and a disappointing gap where a third should be.

After having stopped by home for an inventory record, Autor--standing on a stool, no less--ignores his swollen knuckles to grasp the book at the top of the left stack. He dutifully flips to the end, crosses a name off of his list, and moves the book to the stockpile on his right.

Close observation reveals that he's wearing a silver ring.

Botherable, but somewhat annoyed.

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"Dude, this is a lot of books," Yugo remarks as he wanders by, peering at the two mountains. "You totally have enough to build a bookfor - what happened to your hand?"

"A 'bookfor'? What's that?" Autor asks, wondering where Yugo was going before he started speaking louder than he really should in a library. "Oh, that," he says, and raises his other identical fist. "Nothing, really. Just learned something.

"Anyway, it's good to hear silence again, isn't it?" he says, flipping to the back cover of another book. "From the music, I mean. Yours wasn't so bad, but the bar as a whole was awful."

"I was going to say 'bookfort'. It is a fortress made of books," Yugo says somberly. "What did you learn, not to punch people without protection?"

Autor glances at his two piles before lifting a leather-bound tome. "Isn't such a fortress easily toppled? And wouldn't that hurt the books?"

If that's what Yugo has planned, he'll need to prepare himself for an amateur librarian fight.

The kid pages through his book to the end and crosses another name off the list. "No, though I've done that before."

[OOC: His most recent OOM is amazing. What a trip!]

"Dude. Dude. You make it sound like you've never made a blanketfort. A bookfort is just a logical extension of that. With words," Yugo says reproachfully.

At Autor's last remark, he pinches the bridge of his nose. "Dude, have you even seen a doctor about those?"

[OOC: :D :D :D! Thanks. I had a lot of fun writing it.]

"I haven't made a blanketfort," Autor says, wrinkling his nose.

"And I am not too concerned," he says, shaking out his right hand. "I've got these books to go through and put away. Then I suppose I can track someone down who can cast Episkey."

Which is to say no, and he wasn't going to because he hadn't thought about it.

Mildly: "You are a very frustrating person. Harsh."

Beat.

"So, what happened?"

All right, now he's bemused--both because he doesn't know what Yugo means and that he doesn't know how to react.

"Yes, that is often an attribute given to me by other people--likely justifiably?--but why, exactly, are you calling that out now?" he says, tilting his chin up and raising his brow.

Smug will work, right?

"Because," Yugo says, "the books aren't going anywhere, and you could organise them later, and find someone who can cast, er, Episkey now."

"Oh," Autor says, and has the decency to look sheepish. A little. "I'd thought you were referencing my declaration about the blanketfort."

The kid hesitates. His gaze travels to the books. "There are fewer than a hundred books left. Shouldn't take me more than half an hour to go through them..."

Unless he finds what he's looking for, in which case all bets are off.

"I don't think this is as 'harsh' as you're making it out to be? I mean, yes, they hurt and all, but it's not like I haven't deal with this sort of thing before."

"Dude, that's totally not the point," Yugo says, sitting down. "Why are you going through all these books, anyway?"

"Check that one, would you?" Autor says, offering him a little green book. If Yugo is going to sit down, he may as well make himself useful--though the kid is grateful he piped down about his knuckles.

"For an ending."

Edited 2013-04-27 00:17 (UTC)

"You're being cryptic, kittendude," Yugo says, but takes the green book anyway and flips through it.

"Kittendude!" Autor shrieks as loud as he would ever shriek in a library.

If Yugo ignores his incoherent rage--some of which the boy tries to express through a French invective--he'll find that the last twenty pages of the book are, indeed, torn out.

Autor glances over his shoulder and sighs wistfully. "There are thousands of books here without their endings. All I want is one."

Gravely: "Would you prefer 'kittenbro'?"

Trolling Autor is fun!

"Why would someone go through this many books and tear out all the endings?"

Autor crouches on his stool to stare balefully at Yugo at eye-level. Then he snatches the book and glances at the title.

"Kittenbro? Seriously? You can't be serious."

He shakes his head. "Kittenbro."

"I'm always serious," Yugo chirps. "Kittenbrodudeski."

"What language is that?" Autor says, baffled. He clutches the book near his face, like some manner of word-powered shield he has to peek around. "You're stuffing all the you-isms into a single nickname and... augh! I am not a kitten!"

Yugo grins. "You make this almost too easy. Pass another book?"

Autor closes his eyes and indulges in a brief fantasy where punching is an acceptable colloquialism. His knuckles, however, remind him that this is a terrible idea.

And rude.

"You packed enough conversational garnish into that name to make a salad," the kid mutters as he stands. He hands a thin blue book over, and indicates the list of titles for crossing.

Thankfully, he's stacked the texts in order for easy checking.

"I mock because I care," Yugo says, crossing out the title of the green book, and flicking through the blue book, before crossing that one out as well.

And that breaks whatever temper he has in short order. Autor braces a hand on the table and giggles, quietly, until he can't breathe.

"I don't know why I half-believe you," he says. "Probably because you're hilariously absurd."

Then he straightens and smooths his blazer. The books are still waiting, after all.

"Hilariously absurd is what I do best," Yugo agrees, picking up another book. "Seriously though, why do none of these books have endings? Am I still dreaming? Is the Cheese Man going to show up again?"

Autor raises a brow. "Cheese Man? What on earth?"

"- Nothing," Yugo says quickly. "Just, if you see a man carrying cheese, that does mean you're a figment of my imagination. Again."

Beat.

"Books."

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