milliways_bar | (no subject)

Entry tags:

(no subject)

Coffee.

Bagels. With cream cheese.

Newspaper-largely ignored.

Former CSI trying to see how long she can stare at the destruction outside.

Bother at will.

[Summary: Barry gives Sara an update on the Phantom situation and tells her Mel is back. They discuss culinary preferences and really bad jokes. Tony tells Sara about him and Michelle being engaged. And Sara welcomes Tim back to the outside world.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

She snorts. "What they consider delicacies are what I consider overpriced wastes of time."

She gasps. "Oh no..a red pepper lover. I don't know how I will cope with that."

"Tell me about it. Guess us small town kids can see right through all that pretense.

"Oh, by the way, I got some of that overpriced New York coffee for Mike and Indy," he adds with a smirk.

"As for the peppers...

"Well, it depends on how you feel about mushrooms, I think."

"Mike on a caffeine high. That's all we need." She smirks back.

"Mushrooms are acceptable in proper context."

"Well, I'm getting decaf too. Maybe we can trick Mike in drinking that instead." Not tht Barry thinks he could trick Mike into anything.

"OK, so as long as we can each have our own kind of pepper, the humble mushroom will unite us across the divide.

"But do you like muschrooms in your eggs, is the question?" He finishes his current omelette. "And do you like toast with such a repast?"

"I do like them in my eggs. And on pizza. And one can't have omelettes without toast, I do believe."

"Then your use of the humble mushroom is in agreement with mine," Barry says in a mildly erudite voice. As he grins.

"What kind of toast? As you can say, somewhere along the line, I started eating rye toast. I think Iris introduced me to it."

She shrugs. "Any kind, for the most part. I draw the line at potato bread, though."

Barry isn't sure what this is.

"Potato bread...you mean the really mushy stuff like Wonder Bread?"

"Potato bread is yellow and tastes really nasty when toasted."

"What's Wonder Bread?"

"I think I've seen potato bread, yes. But I've never heard it called that..."

And then Barry is more confused. A world without Wonder Bread? Can there truly be such a place without the staple of millions of bored kids forever making breadballs of the world's whitest white bread?

"Wonder Bread is...it's just bread. A very plain, very white white bread. Too soft to spread anything like butter or peanut butter on. But very popular for years.

"And you don't have it on your Earth? Wow."

"We have white bread but I've never heard of anything called Wonder Bread." She still looks puzzled. "Huh."

"Can I ask what the most popular brand of white bread is then? Odds are you have the same kind of bread under a different label. Sort of like i noticed in your Las Vegas this Coca Cola brand of cola rather than Soder Cola."

It's time like this that Barry wishes they offered Interdimensional Marketing Trends at his college.

She shrugs. "I can't think of a single brand that's the most popular. White bread itself is popular, though wheat is better for people."

"That's really amazing. I'm tempted to ask what brand of mayonniase you have, or whose cheese eat, but we could get carried away." He smirks,

"And now I can never tell you the one joke I know about Wonder Bread."

"I like Miracle Whip and Kraft American cheese," she retorts with a grin.

"Go ahead and tell me the joke. I can't promise to understand it, but now I'm curious."

"OK. Those brands I know.

"Anyway, here's the joke..." He thinks about the exact joke. ~~the mun altering it slightly to avoid offending anyone, he hopes~~ Been ages since he told it.

"Frank Perdue - who on my world owned a large poultry firm - goes to the leader of a large church. He says to them, I'd like to make ahuge donation to your church. But there's just one catch. You have to change your prayer to 'Lord, give us our daily chicken' instead of 'Lord, give us our daily bread.'

"The churchman, he's not happy about this. He sends Perdue away. but Perdue comes back, increases the offer. And increases it again.

"Finally, Perdue ups the ante beyond any chance of rejection. The church will be able to sustain its good works indefinitely on this money. And so the deal is made.

"The next morning, the churchman goes before the lay leaders of the church and tells them the news. Tells about 'Lord, give us our daily chicken.' He says, 'I have good news and bad news. The bad news is, we lost the Wonder Bread account'."

And Barry waits to see if she got it, or if his joke telling skills are really as bad as he fears.

She giggles. "Man, that's awful. Funny, but awful."

"Ok, so we have proven that humor can survive where branding doesn't. Wait till I tell the boys on Madison Avenue," he says, happy and relieved the joke worked.

"You know, I can't remember the last time I told a joke. I mean, actually telling a joke with punchline and all, as opposed to jsut being silly with you. It's been too long."

"It's fine, dear." She smiles gently.

[ooc: FYI--Just got an IM from Josie. She says all staff quarters are full flats with kitchens and everything.]

"I know. No one will ever hire me to open for Leno. But I should try once in a while, just for fun.

"Now it's your turn. You must have one really awful joke." He smirks ather.

[ooc: No one ever tells me these things! :) I guess the Bar was playing a joke on Barry for the last two months. We shall asuume otherwise after this.]</small

She snorts. "Two guys walked into a bar. The third guy ducked."

[ooc: She figured it was something like that. :) She said she'd add the info to the FAQ so it wouldn't happen again.]

Barry sputters and chortles.

"Yes, that's awful. Clever, but awful. Let me try this one...

"A rabbi, a priest, a minister, an Irishman, an Eskimo, a Dane, a duck, a rope, the Cleveland Browns and Jimmy Hoffa walk into a bar, and the bartender says...

"'What is this? Some kind of joke?'"

She snorts. "Two muffins were baking in an oven. One said to the other, 'man it's hot in here'. The other muffin screamed 'omigod, it's a talking muffin!'

Barry breka out laughing quite loudly now. Loud enough that any patrons nearby might notice.

After he gains control of his wits, he speaks. "You win. I cannot top that. This time.

"But give me time." He gives her what is, for Barry, an evil grin.

[ooc: and I think that's a good place to wrap. Take it easy!]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only