milliways_bar | (no subject)

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Hello! There's a Horta at the Bar.

And he has something that might just be a recipe for trouble. You see, when he ordered some lunch, Bar also included three new toys. The controls are simple, so Naraht now has a team of tiny Daleks swarming around him, bumping into things and playfully chasing the occasional waitrat.

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On a nearby table, Guppy jumps when a mini!Dalek runs into his foot.

There's a muffled snicker from the Horta as he hits the "talk" button.

"STAY. WHERE. YOU. ARE. YOU. CAN-NOT. GET. A-WAY!" shouts the tiny, mobile pepper-pot of DOOM.

Guppy staaaaares.

Trouble is, you never know in this place.

"Oh, um, er, good evening."

Then, at a loss for words, and because it's the most sensible default option.

"Would you like a thimble of tea?"

The mini!dalek backs up a little and spins around.

"WHAT. HAVE. YOU. TO. RE-PORT!"

"Um..." Guppy thinks quickly. "Waiting times back home are currently four and a half hours for non-urgent cases, and here they are less than four and a half minutes because I haven't a queue." he says, hoping that this will be a satisfactory answer even if the mini!Dalek has no idea what he's talking about.

Wrong answer, apparently. The mini!Dalek scoots forward and bumps his foot again.

"WE WILL EXPLODE THE NEUTRONIC BOMB! BEGIN THE COUNTDOWN!"

Guppy gives a yell and jumps onto the table.

He looks around to see if there's anyone obviously controlling the thing, or whether he should get Security or throw it in the lake or something.

Well, the laughter coming from a couple of tables away should give him a heads-up.

"Sorry about that," Naraht calls. "It seems his vocabulary is a bit limited."

Guppy looks around, then carefully descends from the table.

"Um, yeah, I knew that... hello Naraht."

He puts an empty teacup over the Dalek's head.

The mini!Dalek makes a comical sight as his revolving head sends the teacup rocking back and forth like a drunken Liberty Bell.

"WE WILL BE THE RU-LERS HERE!"

"I suppose Bar thought I didn't have enough to occupy me," Naraht says, gliding over with the red and blue mini!Daleks following. He holds out one of the controls. "Want to try it? They're quite amusing."

He grins tiredly.

"Yeah, please, thanks. How are you?"

He picks up the controls and manages to make the red Dalek go around in circles.

"Resting before plunging back into the fray," he says. "I believe the phrase for what is going on back home is '1400 hours and all is hell'."

The black Dalek turns around and rams a napkin someone left on the floor.

"How about yourself?"

A small smile. "Understaffed, overtired, nothing unusual." The horta may be able to 'see' another recent rib injury to add to his collection, about a month old. This one is nearly healed.

Red Dalek hits a spoon and falls over.

Indeed. Naraht is beginning to think that Dr. McCoy's opinion of the savagry of 20th century medicine is correct...in relation to the doctors, that is.

"Situation normal - going to hell by express basket," he says sympatheticly. The blue Dalek zips over to his fallen comrade.

"YOU WILL BE EX-TER-MIN-A-TED!"

"Not very forgiving little entities, are they?"

"Yeah. I suppose at least this time we're a doctor down through suspension rather than staff death."

On that occasion it was an arsonist that didn't want him treating a patient whilst trapped in a cellar of a recently burning building.

Casualty evidently had some budget to use up in the New Year's special. Either that or they needed to use up the special rubble cake mix.

"No death is good," Naraht says, righting the fallen Dalek. "Perhaps you should engage in some creative craziness to relieve the stress. Want to take that one home and run it through triage?"

The MASH approach to mental health among doctors.

"Hm, I like the idea, but I don't think Tess would approve. Thanks though."

Things that Tess has previously disapproved of have been a pumpkin, a scooter and a Scrabble-based game where the nurses competed for top points based on what the first letter of patient's illnesses they treated were, for cash.

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