milliways_bar | (no subject)

Entry tags:

bumblebee,
hurley

(no subject)

Bumblebee has spent most of the past few days working with the various humans at Autobase, and has not had time to pop over to Milliways. He's just barely had time to take care of his dog- Carburetor, the fleethound puppy Lissar gave him, is growing by leaps and bounds and needs more running every day. Sam specifically asked Bee to make sure Carburetor got extra long exercise time in the mornings, because the fleethound hasn't worked out yet that Mojo is just a little bit different and can't keep up with the younger dog when he's all excited.

It is not an issue Bumblebee had ever considered the possibility of having when he first left Cybertron, that's for sure.

Anyway, he's still got data analysis to do and several more human reference volumes to assimilate, so rather than push the limits of available time back home he's come into the Bar with his stack of reading material. Not everything is available in electronic format on his Earth, so he's just going to have to deal with using slightly pointy metallic fingers to turn the pages. Oh well.

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"Holy crap!" Hurley says, after suffering a root beer float spit-take. "Robot!"

It would take a much stronger mech than Bumblebee to refrain from playing the dun dunn DUNNNH! recording he's got in his particulate storage as he turns around to see who's spotted him.

Of course then he has to go and spoil the effect by waving cheerfully. And, well, by being five feet tall (5'2" if you include the little projections on his helm) and bright yellow. Not very threatening, is he?

... dang subspace compression field.

"Dude!" Hurley says, walking up. "This place is so cool."

"Thank you," says Bumblebee, whose voice sounds more than a little rusty and crackly even after all this time. "You're new here, aren't you?"

"...I probably gave that away with the 'holy crap', didn't I?" Hurley says.

"A little bit," says Bumblebee. "But most humans react that way to us anyway. Hello. I'm Bumblebee, of the Autobots."

"I'm Hurley," he says. "Of the... umm, humans, I guess."

Bumblebee nods. "It's good to meet you, Hurley! Welcome to Milliways. Have you been here very long? I haven't been here in a few days, so I may have missed seeing you before."

"I just showed up yesterday," Hurley says. "I... yeah, I hate to say this, but if you'd been the first thing I'd seen, I probably would have peed my pants."

Bumblebee makes a series of hissing, clinking noises that turn out to be the equivalent of laughter. "Good thing you met me and not our weaponsmaster Ironhide, then," he says. "I don't think that would have gone well at all."

"Yeah, but... now that I know there's no fighting her, I... okay, no, robot with guns would still scare the crap out of me," Hurley admits.

"That, and Ironhide has a temper to match," says Bumblebee. "Our commander has a rule: under no circumstances is Ironhide to ever be allowed to be the first mech that new humans at the base on Earth meet. The bad impressions would never stop."

He shakes his head ruefully. "I think you have a phrase? 'There's one in every family'?"

"Oh, yeah," Hurley says. "The... black sheep I guess. Or... black... electric sheep, in your case."

Bumblebee nods. "That is, in fact, his paint color," he says. "Although his vehicle form is a Topkick, not a Ram." He pauses. "That wasn't a very good pun, was it? I can never tell."

"Dude, if that was a car joke? Went right over my head," Hurley says.

"All of my people can change our configurations back and forth between a robot shape, like this, and some vehicle that we've scanned and copied in the past," says Bumblebee. "Ironhide's vehicle form is a large black pickup truck, but not one from a company that uses a sheep as its insignia. So he's not quite a black sheep."

"Dude, aren't you a little small to turn into a car? I mean, unless you're like a... go cart or something," Hurley says.

"The Bar's doing that," says Bumblebee. "There's a subspace compression field that shrinks all of us while we're here, or while we're out back. I would be my normal size in the garage under the Bar."

"There's a garage under the bar?" Hurley asks.

"The biggest one any of us has ever seen," Bumblebee affirms. "The elevator that leads to it is over there- they've concealed the access, but it's public territory, just in case anyone wants to go."

"Wow. Next thing you'll tell me is out back they have an amusement park," Hurley says.

"Nothing of the sort," says Bumblebee. "Other things, yes, but no amusement park. Unless you consider a target shooting range to qualify."

Hurley blinks a few times.

"You know, I'm really starting to wonder if I'm just hallucinating all this."

Bumblebee cocks his head to one side. "Is that a common thing for you?"

"Yes?" Hurley says. "Sorta? I... okay, not exactly the conversation I really want to have with the yellow robot. Sorry."

"It's all right," says Bumblebee with a wave of one hand. "I've been on Earth four years now and I still haven't learned all of the human social boundaries."

"It's just kinda weird to talk about my sense of reality to a talking robot," Hurley says.

"Would a talking miniature Camaro be any easier?"

It's a little hard to tell when someone without human facial expressions is joking. Bumblebee doesn't even have a mouth.

Hurley pauses.

"Yeah dude, no, not at all."

"My apologies. It was meant to be humorous," says Bumblebee. "And I haven't got a hologram projector, either. Ah, well."

Hurley nods. "You know, I think I'm gonna go back to my float and chicken."

"I don't blame you," says Bumblebee. "Enjoy."

"Bye, dude," Hurley says. He walks back to his table, and really starts wondering if he really is just making this all up in his head.

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