"Meep," Ed says, because she suspects upsetting a pirate's wife would be a very, very bad idea.

"I mean, arrrr, cap'n! In that case, I'd suggest using our vessel's superior speed to make a quick approach, avoiding their fire, so we can pull up alongside and board her, sir!"

[OOC: I need to go for a while, but this is possibly the coolest thing ever. I'll be back.]