milliways_bar | (no subject)

"Let me try again," Teja says. "I know you hate me. I know you know Urquhart. I know that many said Urquhart reminds them of you. I know Urquhart is a paid murderer, and he murdered me. Someone must have paid him. He isn't telling, and shows all signs of just settling down in the cells until we give up and let him go. So, I started thinking about what that all might mean. And I think it might help you if you can shed any light on all this."

He listens calmly until the last part then snorts a laugh loudly, unable to help himself.

'I see. You're starting to suspect I had something to do with it and have to decided to be generous and let me clear my name?'

Please.

'And part of your reasoning is people think he and I are alike? That's the stupidest reason for suspecting me that I ever heard in my life. Do you think all people who pay assassins have to be like them in order to do it? For Christ's sake, all you have to is sign the cheque.'

He leans on his elbows looking darkly amused by the whole thing.

'Surely you can see the flaw in your logic? If someone paid an assassin, it means they're not like him. Because if they were, they'd do it themselves. Just as I would.'

"No, you wouldn't," Teja points out. "If you were found out, then you would be in real trouble. No, you're alike in the way you despise mankind, and will be brutal and harsh to any that are in your way. So, did you sign the cheque or did you pay him in tab?"

He leans back in his chair casually, shaking his head almost pityingly.

'I don't despise mankind at all. Why would I?'

It never fails to amaze him how Teja is so sure he reads him right and yet is often so completely, utterly wrong.

'I didn't pay him, Teja. You're barking up the wrong tree. Go find someone else to yap at.'

"You do," Teja says. "You think you're better than all else. So does Urquhart. It's astonishing you did not try to kill each other, and instead work together."

Pause.

"Perhaps I might take you to see my dead former body?"

'It's possible to think I'm better than everyone else and still not hate them all.'

Not that he's admitting he does think he's better but then, he probably doesn't have to.

'And I wouldn't know Urquhart's views on the rest of humanity, though he did kind of have an air of superiority about him, I'll grant you that.'

Ramon shrugs and pours himself a drink, obviously not planning on going anywhere.

'Why would I want to see your dead body? You're standing right in front of me and I don't find you an attractive sight now. I don't imagine you're any prettier when you're dead and not moving.'

"It might give you personal satisfaction to see that I was hurt and killed?" Teja suggests.

'It may surprise you but I do think of other things than how much I like seeing you bleed. You told me you were hurt and killed, I believe you, and that's satisfying enough.'

He obviously has no qualms about seeing a corpse, even one he paid for, so there's no issue with him being squeamish. No, it's simply a combination of the fact that he's comfortable here and also isn't going to give Teja a damn thing he wants. He suspects an ulterior motive so isn't going to change his mind.

"What are you afraid of?" Teja asks, with a hint of a little smile.

His eyebrows raise sarcastically.

'Being bored to death by you?'

Teja laughs at that. Yes, indeed, he laughs.

"If there was any chance of that truly happening," he says, "you would not stand a chance to shake me off, until you fell over dead."

'Yes, I have no doubt that's true.'

He resists the urge to roll his eyes.

'But I think you should check your little Security rule book, I think there's a law somewhere that says you're not allowed to threaten the patrons.'

He's probably been threatened by ninety per cent of the Security team over the years but he assumes Teja doesn' know that.

"We don't have a rule book," Teja says, "and as I know Mel, she might give me a medal for making you drop dead with boredom."

He smirks at the mention of Mel.

'She's only saying that because she wants me. Denial does strange things to a woman's mind.'

He may or may not be joking. There's every chance he really does believe she'd like to give him a go even though they hate each other.

"And delusion, upon a man's mind," Teja retorts, shaking his head at Ramon. "Why do you think all should want you? Your soul is truly noisome, and outwardly, you are short and un-pleasing to the eye. You were quite pretty when you were young, but now, nothing is left of it, but the venom in your heart and mind is still there, in full force."

'And yet, women throw themselves at me.'

He is not in the mood to be baited. Living in the Bahamas will relax a person to the point of unconsciousness. Or in Ramon's case, recharge him until he explodes through boredom.

'Also, these jibes about my soul are pointless you know. I've seen my soul, it was showed to me. It's actually quite nice to look at.'

He appears to muse on this for a short moment.

'Admittedly, there are a couple of black holes but I'm sure yours isn't spotless either. As for venom - well, only if people piss me off.'

"But they will set you off if they look at you wrong," Teja says, "or say things that do not rhyme with the way you choose to see reality, or tell you you should not do whatever it is you are doing, or tell you that your breasts are pleasing when you are in female shape."

'That's not venom,' he points out, lighting another cigarette.

'Just hot blood. I am Latino, you know.'

Perhaps the Latinos in his time were more calm? He supposes it's possible.

'Venom only appears when a fight is personal.'

This is leaving out the reality that as soon as anyone does anything he dislikes, it becomes personal because he chooses to take it as such. So Teja is right, every conflict has a does of venom in it. Ramon just doesn't see it that way because there are everyday fights, like in the bar, and then there are the life-consuming revenge vendettas that he's been through in past. Everything here pales in comparison to them. Milliways fights are just par for the course, in his life.

"When is anything ever not personal with you?" Teja says. "That is the great difference between you and Urquhart. He swears, quite credibly, that nothing is personal for him; just a job. That is probably why you hired him to kill me."

He found the difference, didn't he? QED.

An eyebrow goes up once more but there's not a thing showing on his face.

'So you've gone from suspecting to outright accusation?'

He might have known.

'I would point out - again - that you're wrong. But it doesn't seem to matter with you, does it? There's nothing you wont try to pin on me.'

There's a long suffering sigh and he waves a hand.

'Like I said, go find someone else to yap at. I'm sure there are no shortage of people who would like to see you dead...' how could there not be? '...and perhaps the reason is not what you think, have you ever considered that?'

"Name me one specific name," Teja says, "one, that might wish me dead, for reasons I can believe in, and I will gladly go and harass him, instead of you. But until you convince me of one, you are my best guess."

No, he has no proof, not enough to balance a butterfly's wing; Teja will have to wait for either Urquhart giving away his employer, or Ramon (or whoever else it was) confessing to it out of sheer boredom.

'How am I supposed to know every person that you do?'

For some reason, he isn't worried about Urquhart talking. He tells himself to leave him a note at some point soon, there's no way he can talk to him if Teja is going to be around and watching.

'But you run the forge, don't you? Maybe someone wants to take over. Maybe someone has the hots for your boytoy and figured they could get you out of the picture easily. And Jesus Christ, this is Milliways. Maybe you said the wrong word to some alien that got insulted. Maybe someone's cursed to target you and thought Urquhart could do a good job. Maybe someone was just bored. Who the hell knows? And I bet you're the only person who actually cares as well.'

"Charlie is not my boytoy," Teja says, amused. "Not my catamite, as Urquhart prefers to call him. And indeed, the murderer keeps swearing he doesn't care. About anything. And then returns to his book."

Pause.

"But you still didn't give me a name to harass in your stead. Is it really that hard for you? Then I guess it was you who did pay him to kill me."

Ramon stares at him for a moment. When he speaks it's with exaggerated slowness, like Teja might be retarded.

'I...don't...know...everyone...you...do.'

How can he give out a name of an enemy Teja might have when he has no idea who is in the man's acquaintance?

"You know not a single name to offer to me instead of your own?" Teja asks, calmly.