http://he-believes.livejournal.com/ (
he-believes.livejournal.com) wrote in
milliways_bar2010-11-27 10:52 pm
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The door swings open and in, letting in the tail end of a conversation.
"…wasn't the nicest guy, sure, but Jerry didn't deserve to go like that. Not at the hands of a homicidal talking computer system."
Mulder steps in, long-limbed and languid. His spine straightens as he sees where he is, a keen excitement overtaking his features.
"Scully. Hold the door."
He disappears from the bar again, ducking out of sight. Seconds later he's back, suit jacket abandoned, sleeves rolled back, armed with a camcorder. It looks brand-new but that's relative—it probably came with a manual that looked something like this. He boots it up right away.
"This is it. Evidence of the Bar Abduction Phenomenon." Swivelling the recording end at his partner: "Smile. We're making history."
"…wasn't the nicest guy, sure, but Jerry didn't deserve to go like that. Not at the hands of a homicidal talking computer system."
Mulder steps in, long-limbed and languid. His spine straightens as he sees where he is, a keen excitement overtaking his features.
"Scully. Hold the door."
He disappears from the bar again, ducking out of sight. Seconds later he's back, suit jacket abandoned, sleeves rolled back, armed with a camcorder. It looks brand-new but that's relative—it probably came with a manual that looked something like this. He boots it up right away.
"This is it. Evidence of the Bar Abduction Phenomenon." Swivelling the recording end at his partner: "Smile. We're making history."
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Scully sighs at the camera lens in her face, her expression in the view finder speaking volumes.
"Can I ask you a question?"
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"No, that's not what I was going to ask."
She turns her back on the camera and heads straight for the bar. "Vodka tonic, slice of lemon please." The scientist in her thinks, you can either rail at the impossibility of a bar at the end of the universe, or you can relax and have a drink. Her options at this point are clear. She settles into a bar stool, watching him pan around the room.
"Who do you think you're going to show that video to when we get back?"
When he pivots back around and focuses on her, she gives him a tight smile.
"I mean, who's going to believe you, other than myself?"
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He pans to the Observation Window.
"Who wouldn't believe that? Who wouldn't want to?"
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"I'm Agent Mulder—would you consent to answering a few questions about your experiences with Milliways?"
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"Agent of what, exactly Mulder-san?" asks Ako eventually.
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He fumbles in his pocket for his badge without taking his eye from the camera. This makes for a rather impressive balancing act.
"I'm with the FBI. Federal Bureau of Investigation."
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All of this is delivered through the camcorder's viewfinder, which he now trains on the man.
"On that note, care to answer some questions?"
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"Nice to meet you, I'm Special Agent Dana Scully, this is Special Agent Fox Mulder."
She offers a hand in greeting, gracefully placing herself between Mulder and Artie, in case things get testy over the camera.
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He leans a bit too far and has to act quickly to keep his chair from falling over.
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"Though this subject is humanoid in form, it appears demonstrate inferior motor skills."
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Up there, in the rafters, there is a cat. And he is going to get it. Somehow.
THUMP
"Ow!"
Whimper
...when he's not busy falling off said table, that is.
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The camera wins.
"You just said 'ow'. You said 'ow', didn't you?"
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It is probably worth noting that due to the fact Dug fell on his back and is roughly the size, shape, and density of a lead balloon it is unlikely that there is actually anything wrong with said paw. But still! Big fuzzy puppy! Limping! Whining!
"I said ow because I fell and it hurt," Dug explains, hanging his head.
Aww, look at the sad dog.
You should feed it!
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If he doesn't quite sound as sympathetic as he should be, it's because he's busy trying to recall a precedent for giving the Turing test to a canine.
"I think you'll be okay. It didn't look too bad."
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At least until it makes a trilling noise roughly rendered as "Prrrt?" at the humans below.
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"Um, Mulder?" Fox is too busy interviewing a human male in his late fifties to notice her query.
The creature has tentacles. And multiple sets of eyes. They're all blinking at her.
"Hello. I'm, uh, Dana. Scully, Special Agent Dana Scully. Do you, speak English?"
Mulder is never going to hear the end of this.
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^__^
It whistles, lifting one forward tentacle in a gesture not entirely unlike a wave or a thumb's-up or something like that.
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"So you understand English? How do you, I mean..."
She's clearly confused, wondering just how this creature is communicating, if she's missing something. She's suddenly wishing she'd listened more to Mulder's long rant on all the ways in which a first contact situation could go horribly awry.
"I'm sorry, I've never met an," she pauses again, realising she doesn't even know what this thing is. She does get, very clearly, that it's non-threatening.
Or is it? How would she know?
Damn it, they never covered this at Quantico!
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