Ben Grimm - Main Bar

[ever_lovin]

All Ben had wanted when he found the bar today was a nice latte or cappuccino. Instead he is presented with something that is either a cake or a pagan idol, he's not sure which though the napkin declaring "Happy Birthday" adds weight to the cake theory.

"Sweet Aunt Petunia," is all he can say.

Comments

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

"... what the dickens is that thing?" says Ellen, who'd just been going to the Bar for some Cram and noodles.

Because really, who does that to perfectly good food?

[ever_lovin]

"I'm honestly ain't sure," Ben says picking up a fork and carefully poking it. "Either it's a cake or I messed up wit' the time machine again."

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

".... I honestly have no idea which would be preferable," Ellen says. "Why would anyone make a cake like that?"

[ever_lovin]

"I think it started wit' aardvarks," Ben says before remembering to whom he's talking to. "I mean making fancy cakes that look like things. Folks in the Southern US used ta make cakes that looked like aardvarks and then other folks decided to get fancier and fancier till now some cakes are more like sculptures than deserts. It's almost criminal what they can do cause they're so nice ya almost don't wanna eat 'em!"

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

Ellen nods slowly. "I'm still getting over the fact that they're asking you to cut into something that looks that much like a person," she says. "I mean- not that it's, you know, realistic or anything, but... it's supposed to look like a person and you're supposed to cut pieces off."

(Thank God she doesn't know about raspberry jam cake filling or this would be really disturbing.)

[ever_lovin]

Ben looks from the cake to Ellen and back to the cake. "You realize it's supposed ta be me right? Fer me that's weirder than eating a cake that's a person. I mean is it wrong ta eat a cake that's supposed ta be you?"

Ah, the great moral and ethical dilemmas of Milliways.

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

"My brain was kind of stalling out at 'that's person shaped' before it got as far as 'that's you'," Ellen admits. "One thing wrong at a time."

[ever_lovin]

"That's a good point an' likely the best way ta handle the weird stuff," Ben agrees poking at the cake again. Doesn't seem to be alive. "I've seen cakes like this at parties before an' it's always a little creepy when they're half eaten. Good cakes though."

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

Ellen nods. "Where do you start cutting on something like that?" she says curiously. "I mean- it's not like you can get a normal slice out of it..."

[ever_lovin]

"Maybe jes take off the head?"

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

"Well," says Ellen, "all right..."

Please just be cake inside. Please just be cake inside. Please no raspberry filling. Please just be cake inside.

[ever_lovin]

And...no it's chocolate frosting and a vanilla cake. No red velvet or raspberry to be found. The ganache is a bit difficult to cut through at first though.

"Okay, despite myself I gotta say that smells good."

[aaaaaaaagh_sky]

"That," says Ellen, "is a lot of sugar. Wow."

They had cakes in the Vault, but there was just a little bit of cobbled-together icing and it was usually flavored with very old powdered chocolate.

"Did you, um- did you want the first try? I mean... it's got your face and all."

[hey35andholding]

Clem notices the cake, then notices Ben.

And his poor face.

"I didn't think Bar supported cannibalism."

[ever_lovin]

"You could eat it for me an' I could get a different cake," Ben ventures after giving her a slightly tortured look.

[hey35andholding]

She tilts her head. "I don't know if I could swallow the whole thing. Does she give out doggie bags?"

[ever_lovin]

Ben coughs and gives her a look. If he were able to blush, he might be.

"I'm sure she can give yeah a box or something," he says looking at the cake again, before picking up the knife to cut into the head. "Aw, the heck wit' it, cake is cake. It jes better be cake."

[hey35andholding]

Bluntness, thy name is Clementine. Never let it be said she doesn't enjoy teasing men.

"As long as I can haul it all through the door, I'm good." Her coworkers will probably mow the whole cake down in a heartbeat. She cringes. "If it's red velvet inside she owes you a beer."

[havetubawilltravel]

Pinkie spies a party going on. Y'know what that means, Ben?

CONFETTI CANNON!

"Happy birthday!" Pinkie shouts, shaking the remains of the glittery mess out of her mane with a big grin.

[ever_lovin]

Ben screams like a little girl and the cake goes flying to stick to the roof with a sort of squelching sound.

[havetubawilltravel]

Pinkie blliiiinks and sloooowly peers up at the ceiling above them.

The cake promptly falls with a splat onto Pinkie's face - and mostly into her open mouth.

She giggles, blinking and licking away the cakey mess. "Oops! Would you like me to scrape some of your face off the ceiling so you can eat it?" She honestly didn't mean for that to come out in a creepy way.