milliways_bar | (no subject)

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It's been a heavy month. Disbanding the circus for winter, moving everything back to the stables, and getting Will through his post-war difficulties.

The budget has been problematic too. At the moment, Carlotta is doing the accounts, and they do not make pleasant reading. Perhaps they can sell one of the colts to make ends meet?

Suddenly, bored of this paperwork lark, she heads outside for some fresh air and tree climbing. Best to make the most of having a few minutes where she doesn't have to organise anyone.

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Teja turns up by her side.

He has somewhat momentous news. In a way.

Carlotta has just turned over onto her hands when she sees a pair of feet next to her.

"Hallo sir."

"How are you doing?" Teja asks. "Apart from upside-down?"

Carlotta turns back over.

"We've gone back to the stables. The war has hit them hard, and Will is not still doing very well. He's had a few relapses but he's at least trying now. He's going to the meetings and they seem to help, but he fell apart on Rememberance day and disappeared for two days."

"But he is trying -- that is the main thing," Teja says. "In your time, they know not yet how to treat it."

"He's seeing a psychiatrist." Carlotta says. "But he mostly tells Will to get a grip or he'll have to go into hospital, so he's not very helpful. The meetings are better."

"So he is getting a grip, with the help of those meetings?" Teja says. "That is a good thing, in any case. What about little William?"

"Fern is still visiting him once a week, but they don't really bond." Carlotta says. "I think she's getting ready to take us to court again."

"Because they do not truly get on?" Teja says. "Affection is not a thing one may sure about. Duty is."

"No, because she seems to be watching us rather then William. Looking for any mistake, any legal loophole..."

"As a spy in your own home?" Teja asks, grimly.

"Yes. Well, she doesn't live there." Carlotta says. "Will's parents wouldn't allow it. They feel she encourages him to drink."

"Still, she comes to your home every so often," Teja says.

"Once a week." Carlotta nods. "Supervised by at least one of us at all times, so she can't snatch Little William. Or worse, Molly."

"If she did that," Teja says, "then she would be at fault so deeply, surely any judge would decide that she forfeit her claim to the child?"

"She's not exactly sane. And she could try to prove us unfit parents."

"And how would she do that?" Teja scoffs. "It would be like the billy-goat appointing himself gardener."

"Remember, we are circus folk." Carlotta says. "We allow children to run barefoot through the grass, to not bathe every second they are dirty, and our cultures and rituals are different. Settlers are suspicious of us, and call us thieves and tramps."

"Surely, no judge could be so stupid?" Teja says.

"I hope not."

Teja is silent for a while.

"I have something to tell you," he then says.

"Hm?" Carlotta looks up.

"I asked Pyrrha to marry me," Teja announces, grimly, expecting disapproval.

Carlotta blinks.

"Oh... It would be easier to know how to react if I had met her."

"I shall bring her to the feast that is held in honour of Atton Rand's birthday, if that is still happening, so she may meet my friends," Teja says. "I asked her on the spur of a moment."

"I hope you do not enter into such things lightly." Carlotta says. "Even if you don't follow a faith."

"Indeed," Teja says, "when have I ever done any thing lightly? No, I know that Pyrrha is indeed one that I would spend my afterlife with."

"Is she also dead?"

"Indeed, she is," Teja says, "even though things are somewhat different for her than me, technically, she is not alive in any world any more."

Instead, her life-force and personality had been assumed into the repertory of the projected avatar of a shape-shifting god, whose true body lies imprisoned in a cave. That is very complicated thing which Teja does not wish to have to explain, quite apart from his promise to Loki not to tell anyone.

"And you've discussed all the important issues like where you are going to live and whether you want children?" Carlotta asks. "Because believe me, that sort of thing can get difficult very fast."

It's odd advising her father-figure on marriage. But she doesn't really know how to react to it.

That gets a sudden, unexpected laugh from Teja.

"The dead of Milliways may not have children," Teja says, "and they cannot truly live in any other place but here, even though I might ask boons and call in favours, if we ever feel different; but I doubt it."

Loki promised them to let Pyrrha have a body by herself when his plans are ended; but that would not need to be a living body.

"But no, no children. And as she is not alive, I need not worry about robbing a living woman of all her potential children, either."

Little does he know that Skaði and Weyland have already nixed the plans of 'no children', in a strange Norse mythic way.

"And she doesn't have any secret stepchildren or semi-adopted people?"

"There are people she is associated with," Teja says, "just as there are people associated with me, both here and in Gotland. But if they are secret, I know not yet of them."

He doesn't even know how he'd define Weyland and Skaði in relation to Pyrrha, or the rest of the Norse mess. Which is mostly the rest of Loki's avatars, which Pyrrha had believed to be room-mates, until earlier that week.

"Are you sure you aren't going into this a little fast? I mean, not that I'm not glad you're with a woman, but you've had longer relationships with other people." Carlotta says.

Although it does seem these days that a relationship with Demeter is at least off the cards.

"I know what I want, Carlotta," Teja says, "and so does Pyrrha: so why wait in lying claim on each other?"

"Because..." Carlotta hesitates, then says.

"If it hadn't been for the war, Will and I would have waited a little longer. It would have given us time to enjoy each other and talk about the important things, like the fact that he wanted children very early and I wasn't sure I wanted them at all."

"You had what one would call a 'bumpy ride', but would you truly wish you had him not, or little Molly?" Teja says.

"Of course not. But I would rather have had a little longer to be young and free. I love Will and Molly and little William but I my whole life revolves around childcare and financial trouble and if it hadn't been for the war rushing things we could have been better prepared for it all."

"I have not been young for long," Teja says, "and free for far too long, and now I am done with everything, and dead, and free finally think of what I wish, and what I might give and truly promise to one I love. And such a one, if all circumstances are right, there is no reason not to marry. Especially as she wishes for it, also."

"All right, it sounds like you're being sensible about it." Carlotta says.

Teja laughs.

"Of course we are!" he exclaims. "What else would I be, to tackle such a thing? It is a sensible choice, because we love each other, and fit with each other very well. Were we alive, I am sure we would settle somewhere and sell art and craft to people with good taste that like a hint of strangeness in their artists; there is a good living in such things, in some times and places."

"Love is a powerful thing."

"It is," Teja says, "but so is the true connection of two souls that are much alike. And that is true for Pyrrha and me, also."

"I wish you every happiness." Carlotta says, giving him a hug.

"Thank you!" Teja says, hugging her back.

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