milliways_bar | (no subject)

Some time ago for romantic purposes Karkat came into possession of a large holographic video display. He has been nursing an idea for a while, but the weather outside in mock-Scotland has been too grotesque to make it feasible.

Tonight, however, the grotty mist has finally stopped and when Karkat rises with the moon he discovers weather that is almost practically tolerable, especially once he deploys a firepit and spreads a tarp over the damp ground.

He fiddles with the projector a bit, finally managing to project the king-sized screen he wants over the lake. The first romcom he cues up is Pretty Woman, and he grunts with satisfaction as he plops himself into an stuffed husk he hauled down from his room and the familiar opening begins to unfold.

Welcome to the drive-in. The second film in the triple feature will be Grosse Pointe Blank, followed by My Best Friend's Wedding.

[OPEN THREAD! Feel free to use the setting with or without tagging Karkat, he will out here all night marathoning cheesy romantic comedies. Feel free to suggest movies that will follow Pretty Woman, and I will update this post with a list of the ones this cranky sumbitch has approved that people can reference playing.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"One circuit of the planet around the sun."

"NO, I MEAN IN RELATION TO ANYTHING ELSE. THERE IS NO PLANET AND NO SUN HERE, ANYWAY."

"365 days. Or four seasons."

"ALRIGHT, WELL, I WILL DEFINITELY FORGET THAT IN TEN MINUTES."

"THE POINT IS, THIS IS REALLY DEFINITELY A HUMAN JOINT, MOSTLY, NO MATTER WHAT THEY TRY TO TELL YOU."

"Yeah, but I don't mind. I can see sprites any cycle."

"YEAH I GUESS IT MAKES A BIG DIFFERENT IF YOUR SPECIES IS VIRTUALLY EXTINCT OR NOT."

Karkat's manner is matter-of-fact and gruff; it does not precisely invite sympathy.

"Oh.

"Yeah, I… guess it would."

"SO I GUESS SPRITES HAVE MOVIES, IF THEY HAVE A JOHN CUSACK. DO THEY HAVE ROMANTIC COMEDIES?"

"Sure. I mean, I'm usually more into action movies—though," he adds, staring at the display, "I guess there's some overlap…"

"HAHA, YES, ESPECIALLY IN THIS ONE. TROLL ROMCOMS ARE A LITTLE MORE EVENTFUL THAN HUMAN ONES, THEY DO NOT HAVE THE CALIGINOUS QUADRANTS. BUT LIKE I SAID, THIS IS A PRETTY GOOD ONE."

Edited 2013-03-10 01:20 (UTC)

"They don't have what?"

It was worth a shot!

"TROLL ROMANCE HAS FOUR QUADRANTS. TWO OF THEM ARE BASED ON COOPERATIVE AND ADMIRING EMOTIONS, LIKE HUMAN ROMANCE, BUT THE OTHER TWO HAVE TO DO WITH THE RESENTFUL AND COMPETITIVE. A GOOD ROMANTIC RIVALRY BETWEEN A HERO AND A VILLAIN IS JUST AS IMPORTANT AS A GOOD ROMANTIC ALLIANCE BETWEEN TWO HEROES. SO OBVIOUSLY THERE IS A LOT MORE OVERLAP BETWEEN ACTION MOVIES AND ROMCOMS."

"OF COURSE, IT IS NOT ALWAYS THAT DRAMATIC AND DESTRUCTIVE, BUT OBVIOUSLY IN A SOPPY CATHARTIC ROMANCE FILM EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE KIND OF TURNED UP TO ELEVEN."

"Romantic… hatred?"

"YEAH, PRETTY MUCH."

"Huh."

"GO AHEAD, GET IT OUT OF YOUR SYSTEM."

Enzo nods sheepishly. "Yeah, it's… not something sprites think of as romance. We're pretty much the same as humans for that."