milliways_bar | (no subject)

'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the...stable? There was...not much of anything going on, really. Javert has been sleeping out here for the last couple of weeks, and tonight will be no different. Cheval has been nosing around for his next bottle, so he fetches it from Bar, trying not to yawn too obviously where anyone can see. He also considers another blanket, but it seems indulgent, so does not.

Bar also produces a gift, which he stares at for a moment. This again? But then, he supposes it is the season. He asks the bar to keep them for now, and walks back through the snow to the foal. It may be Christmas night, but it the same as any other to him and he is sure it will stay that way.

Valjean, watching this exchange, follows him out.

[OOC: Merry Christmas, everyone! This post open through New Year. If you want to chuck random animals etc in, go ahead. The more cracktastic the better, say I. If not, no worries - he's taggable at the bar too. Also, I will be tagging up everything I owe as soon as I've wrapped the last few presents over here. <3333 you all!

ETA: I completely forgot to set this up the way I planned. Ah well. Valjean, when I tag him in, is also entirely taggable by anyone. And will probably be in a far more festive mood, lets be honest. Also, feel free to tag each other if you want to be all 'wtf I'm in a stable' to someone else! I'm allgood with that. <3]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

...that is odd.

No, wait. Some fool has probably attached bells to a cat, which will now be wandering around the rafters. Well, so long as it is being useful and catching things to kill.

Vyvyan bursts out of the straw, and bursts into song.

"What's this? What's this?
There's creatures everywhere
What's this?
A horse with fuzzy hair
What's this?
I can't believe my eyes
Is he breast feeding
Little pony for a dare?
What's this?"

Oh, and he has a piglet, which he puts down in front of Javert.

Edited 2013-12-24 21:18 (UTC)

He cannot stop the undignified noise of surprise that comes from him when this...man? comes from nowhere. Singing. And he has a pig. A small pig, but a pig nonetheless.

'...monsieur?'

What on earth does he have in his forehead!?

"What's this? C'est quoi?
Is something very wrong?
With me
Appearing singing songs
What's this?
The stable live with
Little cats a purring
And two headed cow is stirring
And the fans for stink are whirring
What is this? What's this?"

The piglet goes and sits on Javert's knee as Vyvyan climbs up onto the rail between two horses' stalls.

'Two headed what?'

He sits, dumbfounded, as the piglet comes and sits on him. He cannot move away because he is feeding the horse, and the thing seems resistant to being pushed away.

'What are you doing?'

Vyvyan gets a handful of straw, breaks it into small pieces, and starts to sprinkle it down like snow on Javert and the piglet.

'Monsieur!'

He swats at it with one hand, trying not to disturb the foal too much.

'Cease!'

"I'm sprinkling some strawballs
Instead of banging heads
The bar is full of toys
For all the living and the dead.

There's stars outside the window
In the neverending skies
And in the stoic man is warmth
That's coming from inside..."

He leans down, holding onto the rail, and points at Javert's chest.

He looks down at his chest.

Then back up again.

'I beg your pardon?'

A strange feeling is stealing over him, as if this man might be seeing something he does not want seen. It is not a comfortable sensation.

'Do not,' he says, quietly.

The music dies down, and Vyvyan sits next to him, picking up the pig and scratching its ears.

"What's the matter, you big girl?"

'I am not a girl.'

Is this not obvious, somehow? he would be offended, if it were not ridiculous.

'What do you want? And where did you get that young pig?'

"It's not a pig, it's a ferret." Vyvyan says.

Edited 2013-12-24 22:19 (UTC)

Javert stares at him. Then at the pig, in case there is something magic about i that is not immediately obvious.

'No,' he says, a moment later.

'It is a pig. And it smells terrible.'

"Well yeah. But I smell a bit better since Shufti got me to wash."

'That is debatable.'

Even he, currently sleeping in a stable, smells better than this boy.

'I have met Shufti. She is ridiculous. I can well believe she is an acquaintance of yours.'

"What do you mean by that, you big bottom burp?" Vyvyan asks, glaring at Javert.

Javert blinks at him.

'I do not understand you.'

Bottom...burp?

He is unfazed by the glare. As proficient at it as he is himself, someone needs to produce something really fearsome to register with him.

"What do you mean, ridiculous?" Vyvyan says, glaring.

"You can insult me all you like, I'm used to it. People are always going 'Vyvyan, why did you blow up the front doorbell?' or 'Vyvyan, why did you throw the toilet out the window?'. But Shufti's, well, nice. In a soppy girly way rather than a 'I want to shag you' way."

He opens his mouth. And then closes it again.

'Who are you?'

What are you might be more apt, but there will be time to get to that.

"Vyvyan. Duh?! Who are you?"

He wouldn't say Shufti is like his mum. Actually, she's as unlike his mum as she could be, and also only a few years older than him. But he can appreciate when someone gives him a chance because he doesn't get that much.

Javert looks at him as if to say, I am not an imbecile, but as it does not seem to garner an instant reaction, he adds,

'That is a girl's name.'

But then something clicks, and his eyes widen.

'I have read about you.'

He has read rather a lot about him.

Vyvyan gives him a very sinister look.

"If you've read about me you'll know winding me up about my name is bloody dangerous." he says. "I'll let you off as it's Christmas."

Javert is also immune to sinister looks.

'I know you are a criminal, and regularly cause damage to property not your own.'

If there is one thing Javert will never back down from, and rarely fear, it is a criminal.

"Oh yeah? What you got against Shufti then?" Vyvyan asks.

He picks up a piece of straw and eats it.

'She was inappropriately familiar.'

This is not something he appreciates.

'What is she to you?'

He will not say 'monsieur' to this being.

(no subject)

vyvyan - 2013-12-25 22:29 (UTC) - Expand

never_shall_yield - 2013-12-25 23:08 (UTC) - Expand

vyvyan - 2013-12-25 23:11 (UTC) - Expand

never_shall_yield - 2013-12-25 23:38 (UTC) - Expand

vyvyan - 2013-12-25 23:49 (UTC) - Expand

never_shall_yield - 2013-12-26 00:02 (UTC) - Expand