(no subject)

[protect_and_survey]

Jemma hates office politics, with a passion. For good reason too - when a bunch of people as intelligent as they are and with access to the sort of equipment they have get annoyed, the passive-aggressive 'pranks' quickly become more than just a little annoying.

Someone rigged their lab's water supply to contain just a tiny amount of blue dye. Nothing toxic, but plenty to turn her hands and arms a ridiculous shade of lavender after repeated washings. She really ought to have caught it sooner, but she'd been distracted by a new Chitauri artifact.

So it's a slightly purple, rather frazzled Jemma that is confronted with a Cubefall-ified bar. She manages to make her way to the Bar, and is greeted accordingly.

Hello! Welcome to Milliways. Today, Milliways marks the Cybertronian holiday of Cubefall, the anniversary of the day upon which the Allspark first landed on the rocky world that would become Cybertron. Would you like to sample some possible reconfigurations? (y/n)

Comments

[hecu_marine]

"Howdy there!" says a gray-skinned and orange-horned, but otherwise still more or less the same-looking, fellow in Marine Corps fatigues. "Made your Cubefall decision already, I see."

[protect_and_survey]

"What? Oh," She blinks at him, wide-eyed and startled (after all, she's just been told she can be a robot). "No, this is... some of my co-workers simply don't have enough to do, evidently." Her little vidscreen is still waiting for a reply, the choices blinking for her attention.

[hecu_marine]

"Gotcha," says Shephard amiably. "Thought you got some kind of alien or somethin' in your options. I already got mine."

Pause.

"You, uh.. you okay there?"

[protect_and_survey]

She visibly re-collects herself and smiles - the professional one, meant to portray confidence.

"Oh, yes, I'm fine, it's just... this is hardly the normal experience, is it? Even for here."

[hecu_marine]

"It's like Christmas," Shephard says. "Cubefall don't come but once a year. And shit, there's so fuckin' many human holidays they celebrate here it's a wonder they don't got more days like this bein' marked."

[protect_and_survey]

"That is true, this place is very oddly human-centric." Jemma agrees, "And very clearly designed that way, by whoever built it. It does raise a few more questions than it answers."

[hecu_marine]

"Been a while since I saw a Cybertronian here last," says Shephard. "Ain't sure why their holiday stuck, but shit, I ain't gonna argue. Means I git to spend a couple days a year seein' what it's like bein' the same species as my daughters. I c'n live with that."

[protect_and_survey]

"I take it one of those is a Cybertronian?" She asks, as a way to avoid asking about how exactly one manages to have children of a different species (that would be, actually, but terribly interesting and the mother of all awkward conversations), and points instead at one of the options on her screen, a smaller autobot all in blue.

[hecu_marine]

Shephard nods. "Most of 'em're pretty all right folks, if you don't mind 'em bein' made of metal 'stead of meat," he says. "'Parently they c'n change back'n forth between bein' a robot like that'n bein' shaped like a vehicle, so if you ever wanted to go about drivin' at a couple hunnert miles an hour, now's your chance."

[protect_and_survey]

"Oh goodness, I don't think that'd be a good decision." She isn't exactly a paradigm of human athleticism in this body, she'd hate to think what she could do as a car.

Of course, her other options are a scruffy hound puppy and this guy, so she's not entirely sure what to do.

[hecu_marine]

"All up to you," says Shephard. "You ain't got to choose any of 'em at all, you understand. It ain't mandatory or nothin'. You just want to sit back and watch how it works out for other folks, that's fine too. Just hit the 'n' and that screen'll stop botherin' you."

[protect_and_survey]

She considers it, visibly, her hand hovering over the 'n' for a moment.

And then she picks something else.

She is very suddenly introduced to the idea that tall lanky men have different centers of gravity than women. It is utterly bizarre.

[hecu_marine]

"Whoa there-" Shephard moves to catch at her elbow, just in case. "You all right? That ain't as easy as it looks."

And he speaks from experience, albeit in the other direction.

[evil_koala_626]

"Naga-takabah," growls a voice from somewhere around knee level. The owner of said voice may be found glaring at his own vid window. Given his choices, the narration can't say it blames him. There's not a winged option in sight! He'd gladly be the giant flying salamander thing again, Bar!

[protect_and_survey]

She jumps back, startled (and also out of a self-preservation sense of avoiding that many teeth).

And then she crouches, fascinated.

"Well you don't follow Earth-centric guidelines."

[evil_koala_626]

The window is canceled with a final grumble before the voice reaches Stitch's ears. He peers down at himself. Nope, just the two visible arms at the moment. No antennae. No dorsal crest. Just your standard, run of the mill, bipedal, blue dog. He blinks at the crouching woman in bemusement.

"Gaba ika tasooba?"

[protect_and_survey]

She wouldn't know which Earth comes with bipedal blue dogs as standard, but hers certainly doesn't.

"Oh, terribly sorry, I haven't any of my translation equipment with me."

[evil_koala_626]

This prompts even more blinking, the ears swiveling backwards slightly, the eyes narrowing in concentration.

"Whatchoo want?" The creature croaks in stilted English.

[protect_and_survey]

"Er... nothing at all, really. Did you want something?" Jemma asks, a little off-balance by the sudden switch.

[evil_koala_626]

Well, less a switch and more a language barrier. Words are not his strong suit.

Stitch headtilts, considering her for a moment.

"PB&J? And coffee." He grins hopefully.





Oh, right.


"heh-ha-Hiiiiieeeeeeee."

[protect_and_survey]

... That dentition never has belonged to a herbivore. Jemma blinks, startled.

"Not a bad choice - it's something of a lab staple." She offers, helpfully.

[evil_koala_626]

It really doesn't. Stitch is an omnivore in the strictest sense of the word. Stitch continues to grin hopefully in her direction for another moment before his eyes go very wide.


"... Ih."

[protect_and_survey]

She blinks back, not entirely sure what that is supposed to mean.

"Is there... a problem?"

[evil_koala_626]

"Naga." This is accompanied by the creature shaking his head to the negative. One clawed hand comes up to absently rub at the opposite forearm. And if the response is a little quick in coming. Well.


"My name Stitch." Each word is placed with audible care. It would be impossible to miss the emphasis on the last.

[protect_and_survey]

"Mine is Jemma. Well, Jemma Simmons is my full name, but almost no one uses all of it in one go." She explains, very helpfully. "Well, when they're not calling me FitzSimmons because they can't figure out who they're talking to, which is a bit bothersome."