The vegetable wingman.

[tire_moi_mes_bottes]

Do you know who'd enjoy being trapped by mischievous mistletoe, collecting kisses from pretty girls and others? Do you know who would enjoy making himself a profession of rescuing helpless mistletoe victims?

BOSSUET WOULD DAMNED WELL ENJOY THAT, is who.

But every time he looks up, there's no sprig of greenery above his head, and every time he spots a mistletoe victim, someone else gets there first. (Often, he has noticed, Bahorel.)

Well, that's luck for you, and it's not as though it's the first time a lonely Laigle has taken matters into his own hands. Now he's in the bar with a potted plant, a potted plant with warning signs.

Warning: Do Not Pull The Mandrake Mistletoe.

and then a newer sign

MISTLETOE. It may resemble a mandrake, but I assure you it is mistletoe and it has me in its relentless vegetable grasp.

...which is all very well and good, and he sets it prominently on the bar next to him while he orders a bottle of wine and an extra glass or two. (He also has a book to read, of course. He wouldn't want to look desperate.) But another part of his mind is working away at the (annoying and probably useless) conversation with Hannibal Lecter, and he's got an eye out for anyone he's seen with the man.



((I'm going on slowtimes, but it's still open! OH MAN I'M SORRY, I fell asleep on the couch mid-sentence, back in the saddle today.))

Comments

[sunbaked_baker]

She almost asks, 'Oh gods, have you been stuck too?' in sympathy. Almost. But that is most definitely not mistletoe.

"Um," she says, instead, looking from him to the sign to the plant and back again. "You all right?"

[tire_moi_mes_bottes]

"Mademoiselle, I am helpless. Only a kiss can restore me."

[sunbaked_baker]

"Oh, you poor thing," she says, sympathetic despite the light laughter she can't help. "You've been struck by the mistletoe, as well?"

[tire_moi_mes_bottes]

"As you can see!" Lesgle nods towards the plant. "I can't move from this spot until some kind soul rescues me. Most distressing."

He turns a really rather sweet smile on her.

[sunbaked_baker]

"A terrible situation to find oneself in, most definitely," Rae smiles back at him, still chuckling with amusement. "Well, you were kind to me when Milliways weirdness had me covered in spots and forced to rhyme. Will a kiss on the cheek be enough to ransom you from your current predicament?"

[tire_moi_mes_bottes]

"Mademoiselle, I would never importune you for more."

Lesgle's icon sets do not do justice to the outrageous puppy eyes he's now making.

[sunbaked_baker]

The baker chuckles, and leans in to place a kiss to the man's cheek.

[tire_moi_mes_bottes]

"Ah!" He beams at her when she's done, and makes a show of waggling his feet. "I feel freer already. A thousand blessings on you, my brace rescuer; how shall I ever repay you?"

[sunbaked_baker]

"Rescuing you from the, ah, mistledrake menace is the least I could do," she laughs brightly, very amused. "You don't have to repay me anything. Consider this repayment for the tea you brought me while I was also struck down by bar-brought misfortune."

[tire_moi_mes_bottes]

"Oh, but that was the least I could do," he says, just as amused. "And you didn't need to repay me anything. --If it won't offend you, Mademoiselle, drink a glass of wine with me and we'll consider our debts all entirely paid off."

[sunbaked_baker]

"That sounds like an acceptable arrangement from where I'm standing," Rae says, grinning as she takes the seat next to his.