milliways_bar | (no subject)

Nita looks askance at the Speak 'n' Spell. She remembers Dairine annoying the heck out of her with one when they were both little.

". . . Why is there a Speak 'n' Spell in the Bar?"

"pLaY wITh Me."

She starts. "Holy--"

"gET uP! i WaNT tO sPELl RiGHt NoW!"

"Hey, listen, toy, I don't take orders from playthings."

The Speak N' Spell looks at her.

Without eyes.

"n - I - T - a."

"Oh my God!"

She backs away a little. "What are you?"

"SpEAk ~~LiKe ThE DeVIl~~ n' SpElL."

". . . Not like any Speak n' Spell I've ever seen. . ."

"pLay WiTH mE!" You shouldn't make it have to ask twice, Nita.

Nita doesn't really want to touch it -- she's afraid she'll come away with fewer fingers than she started with.

"Can you spell 'Not interested'?"

"n-O-T i-N-t-E-R-E-s-T-e-d." The Speak N' Spell sounds about as smug as a demonic speak n' spell can. "I cAn SpEll AnYThInG. A-N-y-T-H-i-n-G."

She blinks and frowns. "Are you sentient?"

Then she grins, and rattles off a few words in the Speech, which are of course not spelled with Roman characters. "Try spelling that," she says, matching the Speak N' Spell smug for smug.

The Speak N' Spell sputters. No, really. It makes a noise like a dying elephant. "a-E-I-o-U a-B-C-d..."

"N-i-t-A!"

Nita just grins and starts humming "Daisy, Daisy."

"whAt ArE yOU doInG d-O-I-N-g, NiTa?"

Nita's not sure whether to be frightened or amused. She hums a little louder. "Do you know this song?"

"sPelL iT."

"It's called 'Daisy, Daisy.' Can you spell that?" She says, and hums again.

Will spelling "Daisy, Daisy" melt the Speak N' Spell? Probably not. But it will give Nita immense satisfaction.

"d-A-I-S-y, D-a-i-S-y!"

"i Don'T lIkE iT whEn yOu plAY StUpiD s-T-U-p-I-D hUMan GaMEs, NiTa."

"Well that's too bad, isn't it, Speak N' Spell?"

She pauses. "Wow. I'm being antagonized by a toy. This is sad."

"s-A-D." It's like a demonic version of Echo.

"Aaaack."

She reaches over and tentatively types something in, then sits back with another evil grin. "Say that."

"s-U-c-k M-y B-A-c-K! sUck mY bAck SucK mY baCK!"

"Wow. You're not censored?"