Happy Hour -- Now with 19% More Barman!

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

[ooc: Pre-Milliways]

*It's late in the afternoon on a particularly lazy Sunday.

Nymphadora and Sunny are both napping, and Bernard's done all he can do on the design for Kitty.

He walks out of the Staff Wing, almost meandering, really, and notices that no one's behind Bar right now.

It's been ages since he tended, between one crisis and another.

He walks behind her and wipes her down, smiling, clearly saying hello. She gleams in what is quite clearly a bright, shining grin.

Bernard looks up, surveys the growing crowd, and grins as well.*

Welcome to Milliways Happy Hour.

Drink specials are Claret, to go with Gil's food specials, and the cocktail specials are Margaritas and Homecoming.

What'll you have?

[ooc: Jesus fucking Christ. Okay.

Asar-Suti comes over and tells Bernard about the Hellfly thingie.

Tony makes conversation about tending and Nita and Michelle.

Robert the frog gets flies from Bar.

Nick approaches and gets blood and news about Bernard's engagement and they talk about Faith and other stuff.

Tim approaches and gives Bernard the run-down of security issues, including Salzella. Also, innuendo about flames. -_-

April O'Neil flirts with Bernard shamelessly for ages, finds out about Tonks and Sunny, and flirts some more.

Bartleby's all 'Hey! Remember me?' and Bernard's all like, 'Oh yeah! You're back! Don't shoot anyone' and Bartleby's all like, 'Shit, no. Got any shifts?' and Bernard's like, 'Double up, I am ORGANIZED now, bitch' and Bartleby's like 'Damn, yo. Okay.'

Liam and Bernard discuss their respective kidlets. (Slowtimed.)

Crowley... oh God. Um. Read it. Includes: Titus Andronicus, furries, an actual Sheep Costume that is now part of the bar décor, general asshattery and photographic evidence.

Lysistrata gets a virgin daiquiri.

Ace and Bernard talk about bombs. SHOCK AND AWE!

Meg tells Bernard about Andrew. Bernard is Sadface.

Bernard breaks Susan Delgado into itty bitty pieces.

Tonks is pregnant and Bernard is oblivious. Cameo by Bar, who takes care of her when Bernard is extra-oblivious. In a sub-thread, Tom and Tonks talk Death Eaters in London Below.

Tom and Bernard talk family and Death Eaters and Gavroche and stuff.

And Janet approaches and I missed the tag, so. We'll see if that goes anywhere.

OKAY I AM DONE NOW WTF PEOPLE.]

Comments

[aj_crawley]

Well, by all reports, he can be really quite likeable. Once you get past the whole 'serial killer' thing.

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

He's on a seriously short leash right now. We had him in the cells for a long time. He's just out.

[aj_crawley]

What for?

Er, presuming I want to know.

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

For very little, actually. Minor altercation with a Security officer.

Bigby was overly reluctant to let him go. I had to pull rank.

[aj_crawley]

Well, in his defence... known cannibal.

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

*He points to himself*

Known outlaw.

*He points to Crowley*

Known agent of evil.

*He points to half the bar*

Thieves, murderers, complete wankers.

Until the crime is committed here, we don't do a thing.

I served Todd Bowden, for Christ's sake.

[aj_crawley]

Er. Yeah, okay, fair point. I'd just keep an eye on the meat pies.

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

Bar would know immediately.

[aj_crawley]

Not if she's not the one serving them.

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

The entire kitchen staff, down to the rats, has an eye on him.

Believe me.

It's covered.

[aj_crawley]

*he shrugs*

Eh, I'm not that bothered. Wouldn't be a first for me.

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

...What wouldn't be?

[aj_crawley]

Uhh. Aheh?

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

Crowley...


I told you to stop going over to dinner at Titus's house.

[aj_crawley]

Well, when one is part of Saturninus' entourage, one has to do these things.

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

Was Tamora really that big of a slut?

[aj_crawley]

You have no idea.

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

Man.

I always really liked the scene where Titus puts the words in Lavinia's mouth. Ostensibly, he's translating her, but there's no way for him to know what she's really saying. So basically he's creating meaning from meaningless gestures. He's a fabulist.

[aj_crawley]

If you say so. I just called him 'obsessive and scary'.

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

Well. There's that.

But that scene's a fucking theoretical goldmine, no matter the actual history.

[aj_crawley]

You're asking the wrong person - I've only a passing acquaintance with that play.

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

Oh my God, but it's so gory! And hilarious! Holy shit, Lavinia with her hands and tongue cut off, pumping blood all over the stage...

[aj_crawley]

You haven't lived until you've seen the film version.

[the-woodpecker.livejournal.com]

...They made a film of it?

*He looks like he's hit the jackpot*

[aj_crawley]

It is so. fucked. up. What kind of video equipment do you have? I can get you a DVD or tape of it.