milliways_bar | (no subject)

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Castle sits in a darkened corner booth, staring blankly at the back of the booth in front of him, taking the occasional mechanical sip of some vile-looking, heavily alcoholic drink.

Oh yeah. He'll make for some fun conversation.

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Gorlim shakes his head. "I know the one name he told me, Malcolm Crowe, but I've never had a chance to speak with him much. There was another name I cannot remember. I have it written somewhere."

"There are a lot of them around here." He strokes his fingers lightly through Gorlim's hair. "It would do you good, brother..."

He bows his head. "Do you think so, truly? Lee, do you know what it is they would do to me?"

"Do to you?" He sits up, still gently stroking his brother's hair. "Gorlim, they just talk to you. They don't hurt you. Sometimes they prescribe medication, but mostly it's talking. I've had to talk to some of them myself."

"What medicine have they for it? Eilinel has given me herbs but they don't do much." He looks at Lee, worried. "What did you speak to them for?"

"Not herbs. Modern medicine. They help balance the chemicals in your body. I don't know how to explain it--I'm not a doctor--but it isn't going to hurt you, Gorlim. They know what they're doing. And nobody's going to make you take medication, either, if you don't want to." He squeezes Gorlim's hand.

"I--I had to talk to a therapist when I worked for the Special Victims Unit--the police unit that deals with rapists and child abusers. We all did. It was mandatory. After some of the things we saw--I mean, none of us slept much, and our sex lives were pretty much nonexistent. I couldn't handle it for longer than two years."

He threads his fingers with Lee's. "What did you see that was so horrible?" he asks. It can't have been worse than war.

He shakes his head. "Just...the sick things people do to one another...I couldn't begin to describe some of it. What happened sometimes to little children--to anybody, but when it happened to the children, it was just--"

He sighs. "Trust me. Working in the sex crimes unit takes a special kind of stomach, and I didn't have it."

"That does not sound like a shortcoming that anyone ought to be ashamed of." He strokes Lee's cheek. "I hope you went on to something you were better suited to."

"I'm not ashamed of it." He kisses Gorlim's forehead. "CTU...wasn't much better. But I hope I was better suited to that."

He shrugs, and sips his coffee, still cuddled close against Gorlim. "But anyway. You shouldn't worry about talking to a psychiatrist, brother. They're nothing to be scared of."

He snuggles against his big brother. Whatever Lee says, he'll believe. If he says not to be scared, it'll be all right.

"Thank you," he says with a nuzzle.

He wraps his other arm around Gorlim and just holds him tight. Just for a short while, so long as Gorlim's here, he can forget about the pain of losing Mercutio.

"Love you."

A purr and a kiss on Lee's cheek. "Love you, too, gwador."

He shifts aside in the booth to make himself more comfortable and just relaxes, just lets himself be reassured and comforted by Gorlim's presence, and lets himself forget. He'll remember later, and the distress will return. But for now, he's all right.

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