(no subject)

[flybywash]

Fly, my monkeys, fly! Do my evil bidding!

-- is what Wash would be saying if knew anything about The Wizard or Oz. Or, in fact, had flying monkeys on hand.

Instead, he has a remote-controlled Hummer, which is turning swift figure-eights around the many table legs in the bar...and, through the miracle of modern technology and a few well-placed modifications, has a small vid recorder mounted on top.

It's almost as good.

Comments

[anthy-rosebride.livejournal.com]

Anthy watches it, flyswatter in hand.

Anyone could make the same mistake!

[flybywash]

Whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirrr --

THUNK.

It reverses, pauses in front of Anthy, and speeds in the opposite direction.

[anthy-rosebride.livejournal.com]

Clearly disappointed, she returns the flyswatter to its place next to her bowl of soup.

It is a cruel 'verse.

[flybywash]

After a minute, there are noises.

Whirr. Whirr.

The Hummer peeks out from behind a chair leg, lens tilting up a bit.

[anthy-rosebride.livejournal.com]

Anthy's fingers settle around the handle of the flyswatter, silent as falling petals.

And she sits still as a statue.

A totally nonthreatening statue.

[gone_byebye]

Ray discovers the Hummer in the process of fetching himself a glass of water- he's never really gotten the hang of flagging down waitrats. It's like getting a taxi. Some can, some can't.

"Whoa!" He stops in his tracks. "Okay, whose is that?"

[flybywash]

If toy cars could do a nothing-to-see-here-move-along whistle, this one would.

Alas, it is not sentient, and just inches forward and back. Innocently.

[gone_byebye]

Well, hey, gotta give it some credit for trying. Ray lifts his foot out of the way, then looks around for anyone who might be giving the same sort of expression. Especially someone who might have a remote in his or her hands.

[flybywash]

Wash does not look innocent in the least. He's rather grinning a fair bit, though.

And look, there's the remote!

The Hummer loops around Ray's foot again as Wash waves hello.

[gone_byebye]

Ray smiles and waves back. "Yo, Wash. Nice piece of work. I would've guessed it was Harper." He starts making his way across the room once he's sure he can do it without stepping on the Hummer. "How's it going?"

[exspdblue.livejournal.com]

Sky was just heading back in the bar with guitar on back when he notices the Hummer. A look of W...T...F crosses his face and then he bends over and looks the camera right in the eye.

[flybywash]

The lens swivels in and out a bit, focusing on Sky.

Esconsed in his booth, Wash groans silently and makes a mental note to add a hidden mini-comm whenever they scrounge up their next load of spare parts

[exspdblue.livejournal.com]

Sky moves to pick up the Hummer, just because he can and he smirks a bit. I think he'll hold it for ransom. He holds the Hummer so it can still focus in on his face. Then he goes to the bar and orders a drink.

[flybywash]

>:O!!!!

The whirring redoubles as the Hummer's wheels spin frantically.

Some loud sputtering noises sound from Wash's booth. This? This was not part of his great master plan.

[exspdblue.livejournal.com]

Sky glances over at the booth and then grins devilishly. He lets the Hummer's wheels spin for a moment. He's enjoying the entertainment.

[diamndcourtesan.livejournal.com]

Looking freshly tragic (http://community.livejournal.com/milliways_bar/10621270.html), Satine doesn't exactly look where her feet are going as she hurries toward the guest wing.

And so begins the epic battle of Hummer vs. High Heel -- who will triumph?

[flybywash]

One's got size, but the other's got those spikes. This could get nasty.

Whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiir -- right into the shoes.

Think bullfighting, only...not really at all. Er.

[diamndcourtesan.livejournal.com]

Why Satine is better than a BattleBot: she shrieks. It could disable an opponent instantly at close range.

Aaaaand she trips. You'd never think she could dance in those things.

[flybywash]

Instantly, the Hummer halts.

From the other side of the bar: "Sorry! Sorry, I didn't -- "

And soon there's a badly-dressed man at her side: cane in one hand, remote control in the other, and guilty look firmly in place.

[diamndcourtesan.livejournal.com]

Stumble stumble stumble stumble FWUMP! Right up against the Bar for support.

Cue one bewildered, Bambi-when-he-first-encounters-ice-legged, fin-de-siecle redhead. "Is that tiny automoble yours?" She's more baffled than anything else.

[nitro-is-ace.livejournal.com]

Somehow, the Hummer has acquired a cookie.

...

Someone is veddy, veddy sneaky.

[flybywash]

And when the car finishes its rounds and retreats to a nearby booth, there's a pleased, "shiny!" as its owner sees the cookie

Then, a critical examination of said cookie.

"There's no way I can ask if this is poisonous, magical, or some other kind of supercookie and get a straight answer, right?" he addresses the bar at large.

[nitro-is-ace.livejournal.com]

There's a looooong period of non-answering.

Then.

From the couch.

IT'S A UFC!

The UFC (now properly identified as a snickerdoodle) lands haphazardly on Wash's table, sending crumbs everywhere. There's a little note pinned to said cookie.

Of course it's a supercookie, what other sort is there?

[flybywash]

AAAH ATTACK COOKI -- wait.

Wash lowers his hands, peers at the cookie, peers at the note, then leans around the booth to peer at the rest of the bar.

And, thoughtfully, breaks of a small piece of the snickerdoodle to nibble on.

[nitro-is-ace.livejournal.com]

There is, amazingly, a smallish pyro watching him from over the back of the couch.

She is, perhaps, attempting to be sneaky.

Or just weird. Weird works.