milliways_bar | (no subject)

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Atton is outside, training.

He has a dozen or so floating targets, like dartboards, zipping around him very quickly and firing stun bolts down at him from tiny holes at the sides. It's very obvious that he cobbled them together from various machines.

He's blindfolded, and he's alternating between throwing knives at them with one hand and shooting them with another, while dodging the stun bolts. Judging by the bright, chirpy green flashes and the heavy blaster scoring and multiple knife marks on and immediately around the bullseye, he's doing quite well.

He may be grinning from ear to ear, because it's reassuring to know that he's not helpless without the Force.

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He just gets a quizzical look.

"Why don't you want to meet my family?"

"I thought you didn't want me to meet them?"

"I didn't but-" Gavin shakes his head, taking a deep breath. "I don't know!"

"You're not making any sense, Gavin."

Gavin shrugs. "So?"

"So, how am I supposed t'know what t'do? I have no idea if y'want me to meet them, or y'don't want me t'meet them or anything."

"But do you want to meet them?"

"Gavin, I just want what you want. If you want t'keep me secret, that's fine."

He still doesn't understand. But he doesn't want to push it.

"Are you sure?"

"... Y'really want t'keep me secret?"

He meant to say 'yes.'

"Y-No! I don't know! I just... I really don't know how to explain it, Atton."

"Why d'you want t'keep me secret?"

Gavin falls quiet. Maybe he is mildly ashamed. He liked to consider his parents understanding people, but sometimes he really didn't know. He hadn't, however, felt as frustrated as he did now.

"We're from two different times and met at a bar at the end of the universe, Atton. How do you explain that? Emperor's black bones, aside from love, what's really keeping us together?"

"... What's that supposed to mean?"

Angrily, "I don't know!"

Atton frowns a little further.
"I just don't understand. Do we need a reason t'be together apart from being in love?"

"What about a future, Atton?" He sighs, looking away. "I really want a family someday. I want something permanent. Don't you?"

"I've never thought about it. Why would I? I'm young. For some bizarre and probably Force-y reason I don't seem t'be getting any older, 's not as if I have a shortage of time. I mean, I don't want a family right this second or anything, and I think I'd make a pretty bad father ..."

"Haven't you ever thought about it?"

Because Gavin has, and he's even younger than Atton.

"Asyr and I -- we were going to start a family, Atton. I've thought about it a lot."

"Asyr's back. You can still have a family with her if you want it," Atton points out. "And no. I've never thought about it - I've thought about surviving for as long as possible."

Gavin rolls his eyes. That's not his Asyr. That's a woman that doesn't even know him.

"Then stop surviving and start living."

"Gavin, d'you really want children right now? 'Cause I don't. I might, somewhere down the line, but not at the moment."

He shakes his head. "That's not even the point, Atton. How can we ever plan anything if we're always going to live in two separate worlds?"

"How can we not live in seperate worlds? Are you going to up and leave Rogue Squadron? Or d'you want me to abandon my brother again, or stop rebuilding the Order?"