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Riku's sitting at a table near the front, his boots plopped on the desk, writing furiously in a notebook.

He's concentrating so hard he wouldn't notice if a giant tried to sneak up on him. He's so confused his hands are shaking. He's so pissed off that he wants to punch the wall until either the wall or his fist breaks.

He's just figured out something about his friends and enemies and the bar, and he has no idea what to do about this knowledge at all.

And Ansem's voice, over and over, shooting daggers into his head and heart:

I told you so I told you so I told you so

[OOC: Warning for a not-quite-right Riku, and the possibility of having to deal with Ansem.]

[tiny tags: wanijima akito, billy kaplan, zexion]

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"And what," Riku says, gritting his own teeth, "Would that be?"

There's a moment of you know exactly what I mean.

Followed by a cheerful laugh. "How should I know? I was just offering a suggestion."

"Of course you know," Riku says. "You always know."

And Riku does not.

"Well, at least you've learned one thing, over the course of your time here. Now if you'd learn to put it to use, you might actually be of some use, some day."

"Either stop yammering and start backing up your words," Riku says. "Or start walking."

Because he's tired of putting up with this shit.

"Security needs to update its definition of suicide to take you and the other really creative ones into account," Yrael grins. "That's pretty much what you said last time you got burnt."

"I'm sure it wouldn't go your way again," Riku says. "I never repeat the same mistakes twice."

.....Hah hah hah hah, goes anybody oocly watching.

"Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it."

He leans down, very close, radiating heat. "I certainly will not repeat the mistake of letting us be interrupted, nor leaving any evidence to lie about what happened."

"I wonder," Riku smiles, "How well you'd do if you had to fight in the Dark Paths?"

"Haven't been any trouble any of the times I've been through them," Yrael says, with a snort that makes it clear what sort of threat he classifies the Dark Paths as.

As in, 'not one.'

"You fight, little boy. I kill."

"It's not the Dark Paths," Riku says. "It's the power certain people wield inside of them.

And what makes you think I haven't killed?"

"Didn't say you hadn't killed. You said 'fight' in the Dark Paths. I was making the distinction, because if you're seeking a burning that's more permanent..."

"I'm not seeking a damn thing."

"Except possibly a way to get yourself killed. I suppose you were not seeking anything the day you came to provoke me in the forest, either."

"He startsd that," Flat tones. "Not me."

"You sought me out, Riku, and started demanding I 'back up my claims' to being powerful despite my efforts to get you to go away and leave me in peace. It was not until you realized your attempts at provocation had failed and backfired that he came forth due to you being provoked by the failure of your own provocation and offered me something more appetizing than a whining child lashing out to get people to pay attention to him."

"Yeah," Riku says, and throws the pencil at him. Entirely useless and childish, but whatever. "I remember it differently. And you're not going to get to me this time."

Funny how he is.

Yrael snatches the pencil out of the air and snaps it in one clean motion, flinging both halves back at Riku. "Yeah, you remember it differently. Probably because someone burnt holes in his own memory, hoping at last he might have stumbled upon a bright idea. Or maybe someone just likes burning parts of himself."

"Though the physical bits he can't bring himself to do, himself, so he has to find someone else willing to burn him for him, the poor child."

"If you have to think I'm into pain to excuse what you did, feel free to dream on," Riku says. "But I'm hardly that screwed up."

Just screwed up in other ways.

"You sought me out, Riku, asking me to prove my statements of my power upon your body, and then trying to provoke me into doing so."

"It's just one of the ways you're screwed up, kid. One of many."

"Care to enlighten me on the others?"

Riku smiles.

Yrael leans down close, grinning right down close to that smile. "First of all, you don't act half as well as you think you do, kiddo."

"That act, that face you put on? You're not hiding him, you're hiding you. Gotta act tough, act like you even know what's going on, smile and make yourself laugh for others like you're not a broken little ball of nerves and insecurities on the inside, past that paper-thin veneer of 'all right', pretending not to worry about what'll happen when they see you, finally, and when they'll have to judge you for what you really are."

Flawed goods.

Edited 2009-01-06 05:58 (UTC)

"No," Riku says, quietly, "You're wrong. Rhyme and Akito have seen me. They still stick around. There's nothing to be afraid of."

Yrael's eyebrows rise in look that says, plainly, oh really?

"Nothing at all to fear, Riku, except for them realizing what it is that they see. Newly flushed with affection, caught up in the newness of feeling, the eyes are blind. You dread the day when the new relationship becomes comfortable, when the truth-obscuring glitter settles and the novelty wears off." Yrael's voice becomes almost sing-song, flowing in a strong cadence of accusation with the ring of truth in the tone. "You fear when the frequent gifts are finally seen, not as physical representations of love, but as representations of your need for emotional reinforcement, of your worry that the love they tell you they feel for you fades when they aren't saying it aloud. You fear that they'll look past their affection for your words and gifts and see you trying to buy their love, see the relationship built upon gifts given in expectation of something in return, or the relationship built upon the act of invalidating another."

"I don't expect anything," Riku says, his voice flat, flat, flat, don't show any emotion, don't let him get to you - "And I didn't invalidate anything, I gave advice, breakups were going to happen anyway - "

All he's ever done is wanted to make them happy!

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