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It's been One Of Those Days, back home. You know the ones we mean--the ones where everything goes wrong. Even the little mundane things that don't really matter, just to add insult to injury.

Alyx doesn't want to talk about it. She just trudges up to the bar and hefts herself onto a stool. "Chicory coffee," she mumbles. "And if you've got something to take my mind off this miserable day."

The mug of chicory appears, as does... is that a catalog? It is. With a model in a... very interesting dress on the front.

As Alyx thumbs through the catalog, her sour expression melts away, to be replaced with... well, she seems to be caught somewhere between shock, confusion, and hysterical laughter.

It's certainly keeping her mind off her troubles, at least.

[ooc: Open until it scrolls! If you can find any more blogs of weird and awful wedding attire, feel free to shoot me a link.]

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Gordon smiles faintly and leans over to turn the page.

Alexander McQueen designed the next set of shoes.

Oh dear.

Alyx staaaaaares.

Very slowly, she cants her head to one side.

"... I don't know either," says Gordon, whose head is tilting the other way. "Where are the toes supposed to go?"

"That," says Alyx, "has to be a joke. There's no way a human foot would fit in there. Like, at all."

"Maybe she's an amputee?" Gordon offers weakly. "I don't know."

"Or she has bound feet like they used to do in China." Alyx grimaces.

Gordon eyes the picture again, shudders, and turns the page.

"Let's find something a little less disturbing."

Alyx takes one look at the next page and promptly bursts out laughing.

Edited 2011-11-11 16:07 (UTC)

See the icon?

Like that.

"Oh my God, those pants--!"

"I'm not sure that even qualifies as clothing," Gordon says. "That's... that's industrial scrap stitched together, or something."

"At--at least it sort of looks like clothing," Alyx manages once her laughter subsides a bit. "That's better than the other thing."

"Even so." Gordon shakes his head. "Who's the target audience for something like that?"

"What's the target audience for the freaking lampshade veil?"

"Point," says Gordon. "At least you could use it to ward off mosquitoes, though."

"And you could use these to... um...

"...scare off home invaders? Or something?"

Gordon just ruefully shakes his head. "You won't catch me wearing anything like that," he says, "that's for sure. Frankly, I don't think we need to let anyone else know this stuff even existed."

"...and now that you've said that, we're going to come across a bunch of it in an old department store or something," says Alyx with a wry smile.

"Just as long as nobody expects me to wear any of it," Gordon says firmly.

Alyx mock-pouts. "Aww, but you'd look so good in pink and green!"

"And you would look good in something covered in silver sequins," Gordon returns. "Which I'm sure is in here somewhere."

"...what's a sequin."

Gordon turns a few more pages.

"See what that's covered in?" he says. "Those are sequins. Usually they're smaller."

Alyx frowns. "Are those metal? Or do they just look like they are? --and please tell me there's actual fabric under all that."

"They're... I think they're plastic painted with metallic paint. Or they might be flakes of metal, I'm not sure," Gordon says. "They're all sewn to a fabric dress underneath."