milliways_bar | //001// stop me if you've heard this one already.

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//001// stop me if you've heard this one already.

This was...not what he expected the afterlife to look like. That's the first thought, the first conscious thought, he has as he steps inside, gold optics wide with surprise as he looks around.

He rubs the center of his chassis idly, as though over an old, aching wound. This isn't death. Or Braid's ship, either.

"So," he muses, quietly, "where am I?"

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"The other five things can be, though the second ties into the first in that this will always exist, even if this universe ends and starts again." Tyler answers. "Yeah, for about half my life, give or take a few years of really weird time travel."

"...as for that last question, that depends on if you can see the door you came in by or...if you're still among the living."

To put...well, not too fine a point on it. "If you still see the door you came in by, you can open it to return to the exact moment you left your world 99.9 percent of the time. If you don't, sorry, you're Bound, but there's a fund for people who get stuck that way, so they can buy the stuff they need to survive, like sustanence or a place to sleep."

That made as much sense as anything. "But then...how did we come here?"

He's looking but doesn't see anything like it. The door behind him doesn't have a keypad, doesn't look Cybertronian at all. Had it opened like one? "What does it mean if I...died back in my world?" He was dying, definitely.

"We open a door and then walk through it's portal into here..some kind of space-bridging time-travel gap-spanning stuff." Tyler answers to the first question then...gets quiet at the second. "...then it's...possible this is your afterlife, or the stop-point before the rest of your afterlife."

Still....too many questions. He nods, mostly to stop himself, and take it in. "Like a space bridge." There had been talk of such things, back on Cybertron, before the war.

The tone of the other's voice causes a strange almost flinch over his face. "So I can't go back." He feels stupid: he should have thought of that, already.

"...not unless someone back where you came from does something to bring you back, no."
.
.
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"Sorry."

"Where're you from?"

"Oh."

A long pause. Too long, and he begins to feel uncomfortable with his own sudden grief. The hand rubs over his cockpit again, worriedly.

That's all the answer he can give to that: Tyler might divine the rest: there is no one who would.

He manages a smile. It's not very convincing but it's a start. "It's no matter." Right?

"My city is Crystal City. But we're from Cybertron. Our home."

"You're cybertronian??"

His expression just lights up, though not literally at the mention. He's got fond memories of the last ones he knew.

A blink and he twitches back in alarm at the reaction. He's never heard of humans, so he's a bit surprise to be heard of.

Especially to be heard of positively. The war had raged around them, and he'd imagined throughout the galaxy. No one would willingly be friend to Cybertronians.

"Yes?"

There's an enthusiastic fist-pump from the little human on the rafter.

"Oh, that's awesome!"

The last Cybertronians Tyler met were Ironhide, Optimus Prime and Bumblebee.

"Oh! quick question before I explain the rules that get enforced by security in Milliways, what's the name of your current Prime?"

"It...is?" He's so used to their kind being anathema across the galaxy. This is a bit of an adjustment.

A strange shift of his folded wingpanels. "We have no Prime in Crystal City. But the Autobots have one they claim is a Prime, called Optimus."

Find out that there's been positive interactions with the Cybertronian race? Bit like finding out the gods hang out for snacks, chips and the monthly full-moon poker game.

Oh wait, they do here.

"Cool." So, probably not the same cybertronians, but still awesome. "What's Crystal City?"

"Crystal City. It is my home, where we fled to avoid the war."

A flicker of emotion. "My home, but I guess I cannot return there."

"...I'm sorry. There've been times when I haven't been able to go home because my door's gone." Tyler says. "It might come back."

Wing shrugs. "I'm not sure there's anything to return for. I'm...not sure why I'm here."

But that's his own problem, and not Tyler's. "So tell me, what do you do here?"

"Keep busy, I practice sword-work outside sometimes, othertimes I sit up in the rafters and read, or greet new people to the bar." Tyler grins. "Including the rules, which I almost forgot."

"Sword work?" A flicker of interest, his hands unconsciously skimming the scabbards at his hips.

"Ah right. The rules. Where were we?"

"Rule one, not fighting except for mutually agreed duels out in the back area."

To that Tyler points in the general direction of the door to the backyard.

"Rule two, this is neutral ground, that means if someone hates someone else, they gotta leave em alone or they're gonna face consequences from Security."

That has a nice solid ring to it, doesn't it?

"Rule Three doesn't really apply to anyone except humans mostly. No going around naked. We've got some general cultural taboos on nudity."

...and all being said with severity of a drill instructor, from a youthful voice.

"Most of the time people follow these rules, so there's not a lot of trouble."

"Duels. Like sparring?" Because why else would one duel? Sparring at least has rules that prevent serious injury.

He nods at the second one. It's a good rule. "And Security? What do they do?"

But the third one...yeah, he's got nothing. "Naked." He looks down and then at Tyler. "Is it dangerous?"

"...no uh.."

...oh good god. Tyler's just going to pull an embarassed and grossed out face.

"Nudity for most humans is associated with reproduction of the species, and it's...considered really rude and dirty to do that stuff in a public area." He adds. "But you should be okay as you are concerning the clothing thing."

"....reproduction?" That sounds...bizarre. "Isn't that what the Matrix is for?"

"...we don't have that. We reproduce in a different way and it's complicated." And not something Tyler is going to talk about much more because it makes him feel weird.

"Miss Bar over there is Sentient, so she'd be able to provide you with more information if you asked. Understands every language spoken to her, though she doesn't talk back in audio or radio frequencies."

"It sounds complicated enough." Some bizarre ritual involving wandering around with their endoskeletal structure exposed? Sounds...very odd.

He's less surprised than Tyler might think about a sentient bar.

"I shall ask Miss Bar then, if I ever want to know." Which he has a feeling he doesn't. Not for a looooong time.

Just wait until the day he finds out what clothing meant and how humans are squishy, squishy creatures 80% water.

"Anyhow, I figure the last thing I oughta warn you about is the holidays. April Fools day is coming up, it's a holiday devoted to playing pranks and laughing, and sometimes you'll find your shape being changed on you temporarily. After that it's Cubefall."

He will wonder how they have survived, honestly.

Why...does Tyler warn about holidays? Do they require warnings? Oh.

OH.

"Different shape?" That does sound alarming. He shakes his head. "I've never heard of any of these." The last celebration he remembers is Senator Decimus' funeral.

"The random involuntary shape-changes only happen in Milliways for April Fools day, and for Halloween." Tyler answers, preparing to explain further. "Us humans? There's only a very small sub-species of us that can change from shape to another, like a Cybertronian might have a jet-mode or a tank mode, and one with fingers and thumbs."

Some hand-waggling takes place to demonstrate.

He hasn't heard of cubefall so...

"You said the Matrix is involved in incepting new sparks into forms?"

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