Tending!

[hey35andholding]

It's in the air...or in Clem's case, sticking to the soles of her red leather pumps. Summer in Reno isn't as glamorous as it's cracked up to be, but then again endless days of ninety-plus degree weather would drain the glamour out of nearly anybody.

Clem isn't just anybody, though, as her rhinestone-spackled bright blue tank top and denim short-shorts declares for all the world to see that glamour never takes a holiday.

Bar, of course, does - and for Clem, again, the time has come. "Uh uh," she sighs, giving the napkin a shove back across the bartop. "Booze me first."

So Bar does, giving Clm a beer just before taking her siesta. Clem just grins and turns toward the special board; as always: everything is scribbled out in hot pink pen.

*~SPECIALS~*

Summer Fling
Beach Bum
Tropical Heat
Electric Lemonade

Lemonade, Limeade, cherryade, 50% off (10% off if you want frozen)
Punch
shaved ice
Sno Cones


Twelve percent off your order if you tell me the wildest way you've ever cooled yourself off.




Finished, she sits back and sips, surveying the crowd and awaiting her first order.

[OOC: Around and backtagging 'til at least six!]

Comments

Ahaha... Glad you're enjoying this thread as much as I am! <3

[herr_bookman]

"Ah, yes, those of us better fed and better clothed," he says finally getting around to preparing a bracing cup of tea, "and most times completely ineffective, past the turn of the century.

"After that, we have a few whose titles may as well be in name only, who blend in effortlessly with a crowd of commoners," he says. "The reveal is usually dramatic, or sheepish, or both."

The boy glances at the door and a smile briefly slips past his bristly defenses. It's almost fond. "Then there are the rare few who are not royal but royal, whose right to challenge others is their oxygen. They wield the weapon of their authority so well, no one gives a damn what they look like--and they have never been made afraid to meet anyone's eyes."

It's probably clear where his loyalty lies.

[hey35andholding]

She shrugs. "And that's why I'm no princess."

Clem's not in line for either a dramatic reveal or a magical, swooning tribute. But she smiles. "You know something about the third, don't you?"

[herr_bookman]

"Statistically, the best people aren't," Autor says, sniffing primly.

He blinks at the smile, dipping his tea ball in a 3/4 rhythm. "Well, yes, I suppose. I wouldn't have mentioned that, ah, type, if I didn't."

[hey35andholding]

"Aww. Such a flatterer." She shrugs. "It just seemed special to you."

[herr_bookman]

He matches her shrug. But not her gaze. "Well. Of the three, that is... certainly the most interesting."

[hey35andholding]

"Sounds like it. I only have to frisk nuns and shoot at guys in milkshake costumes."

[herr_bookman]

Autor drops his tea ball into his cup with a muted clink! "Wait, what?" he squeaks. "What?"

[hey35andholding]

She gives him a look that suggests he's gone deaf. "Um...I'm a cop."

[herr_bookman]

"But... But nuns?" he says, clearly scandalized. "Is this a regular thing?"

[hey35andholding]

"As regular as the guy who keeps bothering the girls down at the Burning Bush with the a blow up doll he swears is possessed by his dead mother's spirit."

Clementine's life is made out of crack basically.

[herr_bookman]

Autor parses that sentence as follows: a detestable male who harasses young women at a place which references a Biblical incident with an unknown, inflatable child's toy--which may or may not be affected by spirits, meaning he'll need to inquire about magic in her world.

So of course he asks for more information about the most confusing factor.

"Blow up doll?"

[hey35andholding]

This is just one incident in Clem's daily life.

Yeah, think of THAT one.

"Doll shaped like a girl." She smirks. "Men love them. A lot."

[herr_bookman]

"Most dolls are shaped like girls?" he murmurs, confused as hell but raising his hackles instinctively at the smirk. "I don't know why men would love these given that they're dolls shaped like girls for girls."

[hey35andholding]

"Yes, but these dolls aren't FOR girls." She snorts, then nods and widens her eyes.

C'mon, Autor, get this before she has to draw you a map...

[herr_bookman]

Better brush up on your cartography skills, Clem.

"They make dolls for men in your time?" he asks. "Well, if they enjoy playing with those sorts of toys, I guess there's no reason not to widen the target audience."

[hey35andholding]

"Yes." She says as heavily as possible. "Dolls. For Men. Who want to have fun. With Women. But don't. KNOW any woman."

[herr_bookman]

"They want to have fun with women," he says slowly, furrowing his brow, "so they invite them for pretend tea and have conversations...?"

He sips his tea primly. "Because that's what you do with dolls, you know."

[hey35andholding]

She facepalms. "Honey? They fuck them."

THUS does she quit being coy.

[herr_bookman]

The boy sputters around the tea caught in his windpipe. "Wha-What?" he squeaks, color scalding his cheeks. "Those are tiny and children's toys and--oh, that's just wrong!"

But he pales once he remembers whose spirit the man claimed his doll was possessed by. "Eww," he says, scrunching up his nose so fiercely it might stick. "Your job is hideous."

[hey35andholding]

"They're usually the same size a the man who's trying to have sex with it, but yep." She takes a long sip and raises her eyebrow. "Tell me something I don't already know."

To be fair, it's her job to arrest these clowns.

[herr_bookman]

"I don't think I can tell you something you don't already know," he croaks, eyeing his remaining tea. "Clearly you've been exposed to--"

Ack, phrasing! And now he's blushing again.

[hey35andholding]

"Hey, I've been exposed to lots of things in my time, but I don't think I've gone the blow-up doll route." She shrugs. "Yet."

[herr_bookman]

He'd tell her to stop, for the love of anything holy, but he's not about to beg. Plus, he fears his voice might crack around the request.

"Well, I don't--Uhh... I mean, if you were to, um. Hm."

Autor shuts up before he contracts a virulent strain of pedem in ore morbo.*


*[Foot-in-mouth disease.]

[hey35andholding]

Clementine just shrugs. "Next time if you don't really want to know? Don't ask."

[herr_bookman]

He wouldn't be him otherwise.

"How would I know if I didn't want to know, given our miscommunication about the purpose of these dolls?"

Because retreating to pedantry is always the safest bet in these situations.