(no subject)

[king_gary]

[oom: 19 Days until the World's End]

Gary didn't mean to find this place again, but it's a welcome sight. He hasn't exactly got the money to spare and needs to stretch out what he has until he drags himself back to the dole queue, or the next part-time job comes along. So a place that doesn't demand cash up front, but will let him drink all he wants anyway? Yes, definitely a welcome sight.

So he drags himself up to the bar and orders a pint, hoping to maybe find some answers at the bottom of it. He doesn't, of course, but maybe the answers will be in the bottom of the next one. Or maybe the one after that.



Botherable.

Comments

[unglitched]

"That stuff smells gross," remarks a small child's voice from directly above. "How can you drink it?"

[king_gary]

Gary looks up, not really sure what the child is doing up there in the first place.

"Like this," he says with a grump to his voice, before downing half his pint.

[unglitched]

The little girl grimaces. "That's just nasty."

[king_gary]

"How do you know?" Gary asks. "Have you actually tried it, or are you just saying that based on an assumption?"

He takes another drink, just to hammer home his point.

[unglitched]

"I haven't tried eating armpit hair either. That doesn't mean it's not nasty."

[king_gary]

"Well, again. How would you know? If you haven't tried it, how can you know if it's kinda shit or not?"

Not that Gary would ever eat armpit hair, but the child has him going now.

"Maybe it's delicious, but you don't know because you're too afraid to branch out and try new things, huh?"

[unglitched]

"Riiiight. That's why I'm out of my game, in a bar full of humans, talking to the guy who clearly has the best taste in everything ever."

[king_gary]

Gary really doesn't know what that means, but he never backs down from an argument.

"Yes, exactly," he says. "You don't know what humans like, or why we like the things we like. You just pass judgement."

[unglitched]

"Yup!" she says cheerfully.

[king_gary]

"It could be the greatest thing ever, and you'd never know," Gary says.

Mmmm, beer.

[unglitched]

"Guess so!" she chirps. "I'm still not eating anything that smells like that, though."

[king_gary]

"You don't know what you're missing out on," he says. "And you never will with an attitude like that."

He finishes off his pint and goes for a fourth one. And some peanuts to go with it this time.

[unglitched]

"Why's your hair all greasy?" the child enquires.

[king_gary]

"It's not greasy. It's hair gel," Gary says.

From about two days ago, but still.

He runs his hand through his hair, as if to illustrate the point.

[unglitched]

"What's hair gel?"

[king_gary]

"You put it in your hair so it does what you want it to," Gary says. "What's all that shit in your hair?"

His hair may be kind of greasy, but at least it doesn't have a bunch of stuff stuck in it.

[unglitched]

"It's candy, genius. What else would it be?"

[king_gary]

"And you're having a go at me for hair gel?" he asks.

[unglitched]

"And you're having a go at me for not drinking something that smells like butt. What's your point?"

[king_gary]

"Well, if you're going to have a go at someone, it ought to be something that doesn't make you completely hypocritical," Gary says.

He takes a drink of his pint and then turns to face the strange child properly. "I mean, if you're going to go at someone for doing something, and then it turns out you do pretty much exactly the same thing, let's face it. You look a bit of a twat."

[unglitched]

That's a challenge, given that the child is hanging upside down from the rafters.

"A bit of a what?"

[king_gary]

"A bit of a twat," Gary says. "Didn't you hear me the first time?"

[unglitched]

"Yeahh, but I don't know what that means."

[king_gary]

"You could take a look in a mirror," Gary suggests.

d'oh, wrong journal.

[unglitched]

"Oh, so it means 'totally awesome racer with a sweet special move who also happens to be President'?"