milliways_bar | (no subject)

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[ooc: post David/Charlie. slowtimed. v.v. slowtimed.]

Charlie enters the wear, wearing a green t-shirt that reads "Tis Himself" in gold Celtic-like letters.

His hair is also green.

Please don't ask him to sing "Dannyboy". He might hurt you.

~~[ooc: mun must flee for some obligations. back later. slowtime please?]~~

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"Well, it's not a panacea, but it's a nice way to relieve stress."

He grins.

"True enough," Charlie murmurs. He curls up towards Richard and says quietly, "It was David. Of course it was David. No one soothes me the way David does."

He smiles and settles against Charlie.

"David is wonderful. I'm glad it was him."

"He is," Charlie agrees quietly.

Richard puts a hand on his back and rubs.

"You all right, Charlie?"

"The usual day-after guilt, that's all. Hard not to think about what might have been if I'd just been a better boyfriend." And all the other repercussions that come along with it.

"You can't think like that, though. Takes two to make a relationship work."

"I know . . . some of the consequences of my choices have been hard to live with, that's all. Bartleby wouldn't be trapped in Purgatory if he hadn't've come to save me--maybe I never would have gone to the island, never have died, never have put anyone through all that. Maybe things would be a lot simpler. I don't know."

"You can't know how any of that would have gone. Could have just as easily been David with you on the island instead of Bartleby. He was mortal at the time."

He sighs.

"And I blame myself for loosing Bartleby to Purgatory. I never wanted to exchange one man for another."

Charlie presses both hands to his mouth a moment, breathing deeplyl, and then says in a thick voice, "I'd gladly take his place. Gladly."

Richard pulls him into a tight hug.

"I'm so sorry."

"Fuck," Charlie mutters into his shirt and then accepts the hug, pressing his face into Richard and whimpering as he tries not to break down.

He fails utterly. "I want him home. I want him home. I want him home."

Richard holds him tightly and strokes his hair.

"I know, I know, I'm so sorry, you know he'll come right home to you the minute he can."

Charlie shakes his head, not looking up. "It could be years. It could be forever. I could be long dead before they let him go."

And Richard knows all of that. He just didn't want to say it.

"Well, I hope that it isn't.....I'm so very sorry, Charlie."

"I miss him. I miss him so much."

"I know. I miss him too. Not in the same way that you do, but still."

He pulls back and tries to get himself under control again. "Oh, Richard. I'd do anything to have him back. Touch him one more time." He sniffles and wipes his eyes. "Damn it."

Richard hands Charlie a napkin. He understands about the Stupid Candle Smoke.

"I know that you would. I wish there was a way for me to help."

"Not even Death could do anything. If she can't no one can."

"No. I think that we can only wait and see."

He starts rubbing Charlie's back again.

Charlie leans against him and takes deep breaths. "I'm trying to be patient. It's hard. It's so hard. There's so much I want to tell him."

Richard hugs him again.

"Maybe you could write it all down for him. Make a book of everything he's missed."

"I keep a journal. It's not the same. And I can't show him how Seth turns his head at the sound of my voice in a book."

"I know it's not the same. Nothing and no-one else will be Bartleby."