milliways_bar | (no subject)

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*The air near a certain table shimmers, and Moiraine appears. She glances around, then starts toward the bar. As she does so, Holly runs up, chittering, and brings a cup of tea. The Aes Sedai smiles in appreciation, then settles down with tea and her journal.*

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"I try to let her know how sorry I am, and how much I want to be a part of her life, but somehow, it always goes wrong. Like this last time, she found out that Padme was pregnant, and got very angry. And it didn't get any better when I said that I wouldn't love her any less because of them."

"She's so hurt and angry and there's nothing I can do to help her."

*She is silent for a moment, and then says quietly,*

Sometimes it may be that there is nothing to be done. The Wheel weaves.

Do you know why she is angry?

"Because I hurt her, and helped destroy her home and adopted family."

"She fears me, too, I think."

*Moiraine nods once, then tilts her head, studying him.*

Why would she fear you?

"She remembers what I was, and what I could do, and thinks that I would do the same now. Which is not true, but is difficult for her to grasp."

*Moiraine considers for a minute, while she takes another sip of tea.*

Some things are hard to forgive. The Shadow leaves a stain on those it touches.

Does she know why you did it before?

"In a way, yes. She was here for the Speaking, and knows of why I acted as I did, but I don't think that helps. I mean, the reasons and actions of the Dark Side aren't very justifiable to most people, especially ones hurt by those actions."

*Moiraine gazes levelly at him.*

It is difficult to imagine being able to justify the actions of Shadow, yes.

"I don't want to, either, but you asked if she knew why..." He spreads his hands helplessly.

"She's so *broken*. And all I want is to fix her, but I can't I just make it worse."

Does she perceive herself as broken, Anakin? Does she know that you perceive her so?

*Moiraine sounds almost clinical.*

"I don't think so. I haven't told her what I think, aside from telling her not to be so angry, since she wouldn't listen to me anyway."

Well. That is a help, at least.

*The Aes Sedai seems thoughtful.*

It will take time, I fear, if it can be helped at all. Is there another here that she trusts, perhaps, that might speak with her?

"Luke. Obi-Wan, perhaps. Valentine. There are not many here she speaks with."

I have not seen her often, myself.

*Moiraine sounds very thoughtful.* Have you shared your concerns with these others?

"No. There have been other matters I have needed to speak to them about. But perhaps I should."

It might be of use.

*Moiraine pauses for a moment, then meets Anakin's gaze.* I would offer to speak with her myself, but I suspect that she trusts me no more than she does you or your friends.

It is not easy for you, Anakin, I know. The price is often very high, and this may be part of what you must pay for that which you have done in the past.

He meets her eyes and nods. "I can accept that. Frankly, I would be disturbed if redemption came easily."

It might seem deceptive, if so.

*She smiles at him, suddenly.*

But I think perhaps your other Jedi Master, this Qui-Gon, would know if it were false.

"What do you mean?"

*Moiraine studies him, silently. She does not glow, but the Aes Sedai looks at him very intently.*

Perhaps nothing, Anakin. It is only that you have indeed changed greatly since we first met.

He ponders this for a moment, and then smiles. "I've heard this place does that to people."

It has been called a refuge and a blessing both.

*A quiet smile.*

Certainly I have found it to be so, and I do not believe that I am alone in the finding.

"No. With few exceptions, the bar seems to be a purely benevolent place. I hope it always is."

With exceptions, yes.

*The Aes Sedai's tone is suddenly very dry indeed.*

Light send it may continue to be more of refuge than otherwise.

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