milliways_bar | (no subject)

*Raph comes in from the Lake. He's on a mission. A mission of the utmost importance.

He's on a beer run. So fixated on his task is he that he doesn't even stop to think about what he's about to do.*

Yo, Donnie!

Don staaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaares.

There is pointing!

"You're human and you left me alone with Leo!"

Uh...yeah and yeah.

*The gravity of that second part has just hit him.*

Oh dude, I'm so sorry. Beer?

"I will only accept your apology if you let me run a few simple tests on your new body. And um, yes?" He was never a drinker.

Uh...excuse me?

"You heard me. Mikey got off because he kept hiding behind naked women. I'll get him later. And his little elephant too."

*Did he have to say that, in that exact way? The getting off mixed with the behind naked women. Images. Damnit Don. IMAGES. Raph cringes*

Dude, this is magic, not science. You can't use science to study magic. That's like...well...you can't!

Don is smug. "I've met a nice guy named Ray. He studies magic. With science."

*Fuckin' Ghostbusters.*

Yeah well....SO?

*Nice arguement there Raph. You plan those comebacks in advance?*

"Nice argument, Raph." He actually smiles. "S'good to see you, though. Missed you."

*Raph nods, a smirk playing at the corner of his mouth*
Good to see you. How goes?

*Everything seems fine on the outside, but inside, not so much.
He sees Don kneeling beside a bloody and beaten Mike.

They're here.*

Don gives him a look. Raph doesn't look quite right, and not just because he has human features.

"Besides being trapped with other crazy brother for six months, I'm good. Well, I mean, he's not that bad. He just got manic after you were gone so long. When Mike went off too, there was no way to convince him that you both came here willingly. You know how he gets. But I've seen more naked women in a day than my whole life at home. I guess that's something?" He tone says clearly 'ew human girls'.

Yeah, that naked thing happens around here more often than you'd think. We're supposed to have a rule 'bout it, but it don't help.

*He shifts his weight from one leg to the other.*

"I've discovered." Don, sarcastic? What? Shock!

"Gonna help me out here or what? You're the beer guy." He smiles and lets him go for now. He'll just tell Leo later.

Well, Bar'll make pretty much anythin' you want. I drink Sammy, but that's me. Just order somethin', it's on me.

"Butternut scotch?" He says to the bar. Instead of Butterscotch schnapps, which is what he wanted. Poor Don.

It appears.

"...so cool."

Ain't it though?
Uh...what the hell is Butternut Scotch?

"An alcoholic beverage." He's not going to admit he doesn't know what it is either.

Oh well, you really are the smart one. There's no way I'd've figured that out.

He takes a sip.

"ACK! BURNING!"

Flail, Don, flail!

*Raph can't help laugh.*

You...heh...you okay?

"No, no, water!"

Flail! Oh, look, water. Salvation!

"You're a nice bar. Thank you. Blah. Blah."

This might be a warnin' to you, 'bout your tests. She's alive, you know, an' you do NOT want to piss off this Bar.

*He's still trying to fight back another peal of laughter.*

"A sentient Bar?" The possibilities!

He leans in close to the bar. "I hope some day we can discuss just how brilliant you are." Flirt? Where?

An' she's engaged to a broom.

What?! I'm just tryin' to warn you here!