milliways_bar | (no subject)

Lilly is on a mission from... well, herself. She is going to find out what the hell actually cursed Puck (this time) if it kills her because a) it can't kill her, she's already dead and b) she has a sneaking fondness for her faeke husband and genuinely wants to help.

However.

Because she is Lilly, her current attempt to help involves a stab at scientific research: recreating past bar "incidents" on a crowd of volunteer waitrats to see if there's any common thread around causes, cures, and accidental side-effects.

The table before her is spread with a variety of seemingly innocuous items: peppercorn and honey and gin, a bowl of steaming curry, band candy, a horn and some cherries and a paper umbrella, the Roman equivalent of a penny, mints, two kinds of apples, a soy latte, and a Mexican coke. (Hey, this is thirsty work.)

Approach at your own risk.

[OOC: not plot-locked but please ping me at 'da emmy gee' or comment on backroom post before tagging so we see what might happen to our poor pups. Accidentally, of course. :D).

ETA: ahahahah awesomeness! slowtiming for now but let's keep doing this you mad impetuous frogs, you.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Now she, whoever she is, is cute. Seriously, the number of hot blondes in this place seems to be infinite.

She's also surrounded by lots of random stuff and is doing things with rats, but all of that is secondary.

~~Never mind the not!girlfriend.~~

"Hey there," he greets her as he ambles up to her table. "What's goin' on?"

Lilly is taking careful notes on the application of gin to scientist observing yuppie waitrats try to build a Ratbucks out of discarded coasters. She swallows and responds.

"Oh, hey. Um. Science?"

"Ohh-kay...? That would probably explain all the rats." The rest, not so much. It doesn't look like science to him, but he was never a big fan of science to begin with.

He smiles and offers a hand. "I'm Tommy, Tommy Gavin. So, is this like, some kinda project?"

Lilly shakes his hand, smiling wryly.

"Some kind of project, yeah. I'm afraid it's the unsuccessful kind right now."

She sighs, pushing her hair back.

"I'm Lilly Kane, nice to meet you, Tommy."

"What'sa matter? Not gettin' the results you're expecting?"

"Uh."

Lilly glances down, and starts to laugh.

"It would probably help if there were specific results I was expecting."

Aside from chaos! Bar-style.

"Maybe it'd also help if you had better subjects than rats," he chuckles.

"Oh, hey-- mints."

He helps himself to one, because they are mints!

"Hey, the rats are surprisingly enthusiastic about helping out," Lilly protests, glancing at the in-progress Ratbucks.

It's acquired a rat at a table gazing out of the window with a tiny blank moleskine in front of it. Interesting.

She looks up just in time to see the mint disappear into Tommy's mouth.

"Oh, crap."

"Well, if you want results that pertain to rats, then I guess you're good to go but--" He coughs, clearing his throat. "--but if-- what-- why-- my voice-- I--"

Something...feels different.

He looks down, cautiously opening his jacket.

"Holy shit, I have tits, what the hell?!"

Icon reflects the complete opposite of what Tommy is expressing.

"Welcome to the club?"

If it's any consolation, he's got a perfectly adequate pair.

"So maybe I should have explained about the mints. They swap your currently expressed gender for the traditionally considered opposite one."

In other words, dude looks like a lady.

He spits out the mint (that's probably not going to help now) and steps away from the table.

"No."

What he's saying no to isn't exactly specific, but it's pretty clear given the circumstances.

"No, I can't-- No!"

He claps his hands to his face.

"Oh god! What-- this isn't--"

And then he looks down at his...lower regions.

"Ohhhshit. Nonononono, goddammit, no. Listen-- Lilly! You! There'd better be a-- a whatchamacallit! To turn me back! 'Cause this? This? No! Just-- no! Shit!"

He runs off, knocking over a couple of chairs in the process -- and ducks into the men's room to hide. FOREVER. Well, not forever, but still.

Lilly contemplates following him. Technically, she should, but the men's room is like, really far away and she has all these rats in various shades of totally effed up and doesn't she have a responsibility to SCIENCE, here?

She doesn't get up.

She does, however, write a note.

Dear Tommy,
Sorry becoming a lady freaked you out so hard, it's really pretty awesome when you get used to it. However, should you choose to return to external genitalia, just give this mint to a willing lady of your acquaintance, and once she eats it the two of you need to kiss. Presto change-o, you're as much a man as you ever were.

Lilly

She encloses a mint and drops the whole thing off at bar.