milliways_bar | (no subject)

*raises an eyebrow*
Really? Guess everyone's got dirty laundry.

Yeah, well it's hard to take color away from people. *thinks back to the movie, and how it ends in black and white* On second thought....

*he looks away at the obtrusive, and bluntly honest question*
Sure it's overrated, but haven't you ever wished for it? Just once?

It seems so. You find out the most interesting things when people hit old age and forget to keep their mouths shut.

*dry* You'd be amazed.

Of course. *softly* But if I were suddenly normal? Normal skin and no magic, fitting in everywher or anywheree? Able to touch water? I don't know that I'd want that. It would be nice, I think, but there's a trade. I've been loved, green as I am, and strange as I am, and for whom I am, green, cranky, wicked, soul-less, and all. I don't know that I'd want to give up whatever I'd have to for that.

Man, that's gotta be awkward. I hope to be long dead before that happens to me. Heh, I should ask Death about that. *smirks*

*still looking away*
yeah, well what if you didn't have love before? like it wasn't a concept you were capable of. and then someone gave it to you, even by accident.

*turns back to her and raises an eyebrow*
what would you do then?

*rubs eyes* You have no idea. I'd recommend doing anything to avoid it.

*laughs* I don't think you really want my advice on anything related to love. *shrugs* But I do think anyway that love and hate are the two strongest emotions and are hard to get rid of once found. I also think I'd rather be hated for being what I am than loved for being what I'm not. And as I've experienced both, I suppose I can say that.

Yeah, I think I'm gonna.
*she's not crying...is she? nahh, she's too tough for that*

Only thing that ever hated us for what we were, is dead.
Rest of the world is just scared of us.
*sighs*
I'd say fear trumps love and hate.

Smart move.

Then you're fairly lucky again.

Mmm. It does. Fear's a powerful thing. It's how dictators stay in power. *studies her glass for a moment* If love can be lost that easily, though? I'd say it costs too much.

Luck had nothing to do with it. My brother cut the fucker's head off, and we burned his body in the East River.

Ain't that the gamble though?
What's the use of a prize that's easily won?

*smirks* At least you did it properly.

Who said anything about it being easily won? Love is always hard. But even love can cost too much.

Even bastards can have honor. Don't know that he did, but Leo does...in spades.

Have to take your word on that. Wouldn't really know.

What's honor to you, then?

*shortly* I would.

Honor is being the better person in all things. Bastards are just people who "know" they're better than everyone else. Shredder just happened to be wrong in that Leo was actually better than him.

Hell, Leo's better than just about everyone.
*sighs*

So which one of us is luckier in that arrangement?

You miss him.

Probably I am in some ways. My lover's long dead and gone. I may be alone, but at least I'm used to it by now, and long disillusioned about most things. *crooked smile* But I hope you're happier than I.

*Sighs and rubs his forehead. He could try to lie, but really, she's got him dead to rights.*
Sometimes. He really is a self important bastard sometimes.

Wouldn't know about that either.

Of course he is. That's how family is. Let's see, so he's your Rat's favourite. Does he do the holier-than-thou bit, trying to change you to be more like how he, and your Splinter, think you should be?

No. But I suppose you'll find out soon enough.

*dripping with sarcasm*
Oh, so you've met'im.

*his eyes flick over to where Penny is standing*
What makes you say that?

Uh-huh. If Nessa wasn't dead, I'd introduce you to her. I'm sure you'd love her. She's ever so perfect, of course, and angelic. A gift from the Unnamed God, and, of course, perfectly devout.

*shrugs* Things change, for better or worse. And whether it's for better or worse, once they have, you'll know. As long as you don't get her killed by assassins, ~~or possibly changed into a scarecrow~~ you'll still be doing better than I managed.

Sounds like a treat. Make a hell of a pair, the two of them. They could go bowling.

Attack from above isn't in my plans. One of the benefits of this place. No assassins. Well, none other than me that is.

I'm sorry for your loss.
*very sincere*

No arms, no hands, so not bowling, but she'd be great at anything involving feet. They can lecture each other.

Then that should work out nicely for you.

*soft smile* So am I. But I suppose I got more than I deserved. I really never expected to ever be loved, so it was nice while it lasted. *not very convincing, but not focusing too much on the subject either*

Oh yeah, forgot 'bout that part. Kinda makes me wonder which of them would give up first.

*shrugs* Here's hopin'. Can't help but think a foot soldier is going to come waltzin' in the door one day.

Hey, I don't like people talkin' that way 'bout my friends.
*small smile*

Hmm. It could be interesting. To her dying day, Nessa was still trying to convince me to be baptized.

She never really understood the "atheist" bit, or the "water burns" bit, I think.

I suspect you're more than capable of taking care of it, should that happen.

*blinks, then smiles slightly in surprise* I suppose I can be quiet for once.

*laughs* I know what you mean. Never got into religion myself. When I was around 7 I snuck away from home to listen to a Sunday school class. Just so happens one of the kids 'round my age had a hamster die, so they asked the teacher if Hammy would be in heaven waiting. The teacher told the kid that animals don't have souls, and as such don't go to heaven. *shrug* Still like Christmas though.

*smiles broadly*
Good.

*smiles* I was always fond of Lurlinemas myself.

Don't get used to it.

*raises an eyebrow*
Lots of food and frieds and presents?

*smirk*

More or less. But I liked it mostly because it annoyed my father. He was a more traditional minister, and thought it was just more of the pleasure faith.

Jerk.

Well, he's right...and that's what makes it so much more fun.
There was this one Christmas, my brother Mike helped stop this delivery truck full of dolls from being hijacked. So we delivered the toys to this children's home. *starts to laugh* Only he thought it'd be a good idea to dress as Santa and elves.
*laughter dies down to a smile*
Can't even say that it was the holiday,...think it mighta just been him. *smile fades*

*smile*
See? Aren't you glad you got to know me better?