milliways_bar | (no subject)

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Chandler's always known that eventually, he'd get caught. You can only skive off of work to go to a bar so many times before someone notices. He'd just never expected that someone to be the Bar.

He's being put to work, because he keeps ditching work. That's the way he sees it. He's never tended a bar. He's never even waited tables. He's had one job his entire life, and that was statistical anayalsys and data reconfiguration. Still, he goes behind the Bar, and fumbles around, trying to figure out what it is he's meant to be doing. Eventually, he comes up with a plan.

Happy Hour
Apologies in advance for the new guy

SPECIALS

Rum and Coke/Rum and Diet Coke
Chocolate Milk
Coffee

And that exhausts the list of things he can make on his own. Grabbing a Yoo-hoo for himself, he sits back and waits for something to happen.

Fake!Tag: Chandler Bing

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"I've been told it's possessed or something," Chandler says.

"Possessed?"

He looks doubtful.

"I was told she's - uh. Sentient. And that she talks to you through napkins sometimes."

Chandler passes over the napkin he got that told him to run things for a few hours.

"You mean like that?" he asks.

He's never actually seen a bar-written note before.

So when he glances at the napkin, reading the brief note, he nods dumbly.

"Yeah," he says, quickly regaining his composure. "Just like that."

It's the first one Chandler's ever seen, too.

"Yeah, sure took me by surprise," he says.

Interesting!

"So ... you haven't been here long either?"

"I'm not sure how long it's been here," Chandler says. "But about a month and a half back home."

"Longer than me," he remarks. "This is only my second time here."

Chandler knows there's some sort of something you're supposed to tell the new people, but he's still trying to figure it all out, himself.

"Liking it so far?" he settles on.

He shrugs.

"I'm still getting used to it," he admits. "But ... I could think of worse places to be."

"Oh, yeah," Chandler agrees. "So could I. It was weird at first, but you get used to it."

"I guess. Well, used to it enough to like it, anyway."

Not that he's reached that point exactly. Yet.

"It can be fun," Chandler says. "You get to meet all sorts of people around here. Most of them are pretty cool."

Some are absolutely nuts, though.

"So far I've had some luck with nice people," he says in agreement.

"Though I was warned about someone called Blodwen."

"Haven't met him yet," Chandler says. He seems relieved about that.

"You might also want to watch out for..." he realises that in all the time he's been harassed by the guy, he hasn't actually found out his name "... this big, Scottish psychopath. Blond hair, really creepy."

Edited 2010-02-17 00:59 (UTC)

"I think Blodwen's a woman," he corrects. "Apparently she can control you if you give her your full name."

And as for that Scottish guy? He nods.

"I'll look out for him too."

"Do you mean just first and last, or your embarrassing middle name, too?" Chandler asks.

Nico frowns.

"I'm not sure."

Pause.

"Why? You have an embarrassing middle name?"

"Doesn't everybody?"

Nice save.

"I don't."

He doesn't actually have a middle name that canon knows of.

"Oh," Chandler says dumbly.

His middle name is Muriel. It really doesn't get much worse than that.

"I'm Nico, by the way."

While they're on the topic of names.

"Chandler," he responds. "New York, 1994."

It's his standard greeting.

"1994? Huh. I'm from 2008. New York, too."

He frowns.

"I wonder if it's very different."

"I'll let you know when I get there," Chandler answers. "I've only been in the city for about five years, myself, but it hasn't really changed at all in that time."