Returning post!

[scots_wolf]

[[From here]]

The door opens, and Urquhart and Moist come in, carrying several bags -- carpet bags, saddle bags, bags of coin, and a bucket of freshly caught fish.

Urquhart is wearing rough leather trousers, a billowy yellow silk shirt, and a huge double headed axe. He's got his arm around Moist, who is grinning like the cat who got not only one canary but a cageful.


Franz is jumping around them, barking cheerfully, happy to be with both his humans, and back in the place he knows best.

They are all in a very good mood.

Comments

[ostro_goth]

"What you may have missed," the Goth says, acidly, "is that I am a smith, run a forge, and am in the business of selling weapons."

[morethanprops]

"No, I was quite aware of that, but I'm not in the market for weapons. I'd recommend speaking to Urquhart."

[ostro_goth]

"Then why did you steal my biggest axe?" Teja says, picking up the weapon from where it's leaning against the mantle.

[morethanprops]

"What use would I have for an axe? I'm not sure I could even swing it properly."

[ostro_goth]

"Then what is it doing here, among you loot?" Teja says, swinging it around quite casually.

"And you're not quite that puny. I'm sure my murderer would not bed you if you were."

[morethanprops]

"Oh that, I think it wanted to come in out of the rain."

[ostro_goth]

"Are you claiming you found it, left out?" Teja says.

Long pause.

"Your dog seems to like my cat. How about you pay me for the axe, and then I shall stop pestering you, for now?"

[morethanprops]

"No, its already in here. There's no reason I had anything to do with it. You really need to learn to be less suspicious, its not an attractive quality."

[ostro_goth]

"I do not mean to be attractive to you," Teja says. "On the contrary. Buy the axe, and I shall take my unattractive self away."

[morethanprops]

"Just because its near me doesn't mean I want it. Ask someone else. Now there's no need to be so hard on yourself, you have your nice qualities."

[ostro_goth]

"It is clearly part of all your jumbled possessions," Teja says. "And I would not wish to hear which qualities in me you find 'nice', as you so eloquently put it."

[morethanprops]

"Why not? Perhaps it would do you some good. You'll never find another lover if you don't have any confidence. You're handsome enough in that brooding way that vampires like that I'm sure you all you need is someone to brood beside you in bed."

[ostro_goth]

Teja stares at him

Then, unexpectedly, he laughs out loud.

"I should smack you upside your head for that remark," he chortles. "You are an imp, Alfred Spangler, the sort that people kill with fire to get off the property they are infesting, and you fit very well with my murderer."

[morethanprops]

"Now you're the one who's overreacting. I was just considering what might make you relax more as new lovers can be nicely distracting."

[ostro_goth]

"I am not proposing to kill you with fire," Teja says, still laughing, "just insinuating that some people will want to. Eventually."

Pause.

"Well, will you propose to introduce me to a nice vampire from your world, next?"

He is still mightily amused.

[morethanprops]

Moist doesn't want Teja to meet Lady Margolotta, they'll have far too much to say to each other,

"No, then I'd have to worry about you on the Disc."

[ostro_goth]

"That would be fearsome, would it not?" Teja says. "I would learn about all your tricks."

[morethanprops]

"Your mind doesn't work like mine does. I don't think you would."

[ostro_goth]

"I am not so stupid as not to follow the ruminations and plans of a small crook," Teja says. "I can even understand what my cats are plotting, at times."

And some Alfred Spangler should be much easier to understand than cats!

[morethanprops]

Moist shrugs and pets Franz, Teja can think whatever he wishes.

[ostro_goth]

"That offended you, did it?" Teja says. "Why not just pay for the axe, and I shall leave?"

[morethanprops]

"No, you're boring me."

[scots_wolf]

That is when Urquhart returns from the kitchen, minus the fish, smelling slightly of baking, and carrying two glasses of the very best whisky.

"He's boring you?" he says, handing Moist his whisky. "What can I do to make him go away? Bare my bottom? Do you think the Goth will flee in horror?"

[morethanprops]

"Then he'd think you're vulgar and lecture you on that as well. He was bothering me about the axe that apparently he thinks we stole."

[scots_wolf]

"What a funny notion," Urquhart says. "We didn't steal that axe. Absolutely not. I borrowed it, with every intention to return it right about now. Seems he's already taken it back."

Teja shakes his head, and sighs. "I run a forge and accept commissions, and I forge weapons that are for sale," he says. "Why did you not think to just buy it, if you had need of it? For a presumably well-educated murderer, you are very stupid."