milliways_bar | (no subject)

Ralph is greeted at the bar by a napkin. "Late for what?" he asks, and gets another napkin in reply. "Me? But why?" Napkin. "What kind of 'special occasion'?" Napkin, eyeroll. "Fine, fine, don't tell me." He sighs and heads around behind the bar. "Could I get a few drink suggestions? To go with the theme?" The specials board fills itself out:

SONIC: THE FIGHTERS
Miles "Tails" Prower
Sonic the Hedgehog

STREET FIGHTER II
Blankatini
Bloody Bison
Chun-Li ice tea
Flash Kick!
Hadouken!
Shoryuken!
Spinning Piledriver
Yoga Flame

SUPER MARIO BROS. (on PlayChoice-10)
Boo Shot
Bowser
Goomba
Princess Peach
Warp Pipe

TEKKEN
Kuma's Furry Cup
Nina Colada
Paul Phoenix Rising
Yoshimitsu's Poison Breath

"...all righty then." He turns to face the customers and tries to look happy to be there. "What'll it be?"

[In honor of his canon now being in Japanese cinemas, have a tending Ralph! Open to new threads until it scrolls, and to new tags until your brainmeats can't do it anymore.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Ralph chuckles. "Talk a lot, don't you? So what's your name — Chatterbox?" One strawberry milkshake up.

"And yeah, they're very nice. At least, they're nice enough to each other. They weren't always nice to me, but I guess I can understand that. We didn't exactly get off to a good start, them and me."

She laughs. "Nope!" BOUNCE! "OOH GUESS MY NAME GUESS MY NAME!" She frowns. "But why wouldn't anybody like you? You're so nice!"

"Let's see... Pink Pistol? Bouncy Bubble?" He notices the balloons on her flank. "Bouncy Balloon?

"It's like this. Before Niceland East was, well, Niceland East, it was the Niceland Apartments' garbage dump. And before it was the Niceland Apartments' garbage dump, it was part of the forest where I lived. And then they tore down that forest to have room to build the apartments. So I... kind of lost my temper and tried to wreck the building."

EVEN MORE BOUNCING.

"YOU'RE SO CLOSE SO CLOSE!" But no cigar yet, Ralph! She stops bouncing all at once when she hears his story. "But that's terrible! Did they make you go to jail?"