milliways_bar | (no subject)

He nods.

"It should. I suppose I should trust it more, and talk to Amadeo about it."

"It might be the best idea. He's probably different to me, you shouldn't just go by what I can tell you."

He nods again.

"You're right. That must be personal taste like everything else. I'll speak with him tonight. Thank you for your help."

A brief, hollow smile.

"I'm glad I could help."

"You said you like books. What sort?"

"Bar's been giving me what Nick calls fantasy books... they remind me of Tortall. A lot of the worlds in them are similar."

"I should ask her for some. I used to read a lot of science fiction and fantasy. I've been reading some of the books about the vampires that I know. That's been helpful."

"I think she knows what Tortall was like, wants to remind me of it."

I miss Jon and Gary and Raoul...

"What was Tortall like, Alex?"

He looks slightly startled.

"It... I don't know, it's a fairly large country, bordered by Scanra, Galla, Tusaine and Tyra, and the Emerald Ocean. There's the Great Desert in the south, where the Bazhir live, the Grimhold Mountains in the north, on the border of Scanra. The middle's hill country, where three of the major lake fiefs are; Naxen, Goldenlake and Tirragen. Corus is on the coast, near the coastal hills and Port Caynn."

"It sounds very pretty. Was the Emerald Ocean really green?"

"Mmm. Especially at dawn and sunset. A beautiful dark green colour. I was ten the first time I saw it, when I was taken to Corus for training. I'd spent the first ten years of my life in Tirragen."

"Must have been rough having to move so young."

He shrugs.

"The oldest son of every noble family is sent to Corus to train as a knight. I knew it was expected of me."

"Well, that's not so bad, then. How long did you train as a knight?"

"Eight years. Four as a page, then when I was fourteen Duke Roger took me as his squire. Would-be knights have to face the Ordeal the midwinter after their eighteenth birthday."

"And then you were a full knight after that?"

Richard won't ask about Alex's Ordeal. Richard faced his own Ordeal already, and doesn't like to talk about it.

"Mmmhmm. Knight of the realm, all that. For five years, until I was twenty-three."

"What did you do after that?"

A soft laugh, the laugh Nick hates.

"Then I died and went to Hell."

"Oh, Jesus, I'm sorry. I never know when to stop asking."

Another soft laugh.

"Don't be sorry. It was a logical question. Half the bar would send me back for what happened with Meg and Anthy, anyway."

"Well, I don't know Meg or Anthy very well, but I would never send anyone to Hell. Not even my worst enemy."

And he wouldn't. He's seen it.

"The Black God's realm is supposed to be a pleasant place, for those he favours. Heroes and the like. Traitors like me get what they deserve."

He tilts his head, considering.

"I wonder if Roger has ever been there."

"Someone out there thought you didn't deserve it. That's why you're here."

He shakes his head.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, this is none of my business. We can talk about something else."

He fidgets.

"I'm sorry."